Defining Normality
by Sophia Banks
Summary: Hatti Digger's first day makes it clear that she had not been properly trained to be a Bailiff in Manhattan's Night Court! At the very least she has no trouble connecting with her co-workers, despite their oddities. Especially Dan Fielding, the lecherous District Attorney. Together they fight through betrayals, holidays, and feelings they never thought they could have.(DanxOC)
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Be prepared for anything**

Hatti entered the empty courtroom through the double doors, stepping in between rows of wooden pews and stopping at the barrier to take it all in. The Judge's bench, the lawyer's desks, jury box that would never be used while she was working. _Inhale, exhale_. This was what she'd been training for after all. Though when she'd first started she'd assumed she'd be working somewhere less...groady. The walls were dingy grey, the floors freshly waxed but otherwise in similar disrepair. Some of the pews had been carved into, saying "I+M 4-EVER" and "judge stone is a clodpole!" upon further inspection of one.  
Behind her the "dregs of society" had already seated themselves. Smiling crookedly to herself Hatti moved past the barrier and towards the door to the left of the Judge's stand. Through there she found yet another door just across from her, the hallway stretching out in both directions. Hatti approached, raising a pale hand and knocking. Somewhere inside she thought she could hear a steady-if not muffled- thump-thump-thump.

A moment's pause, then, "Come on in!" sounded from inside.

Hatti twisted the doorknob and pushed her way through, finding herself in a cozy office. Bookshelves surrounded two of the three walls, a green couch sitting at an angle nearest Hatti. The room was filled with oddities that couldn't be explained, a black and white picture of a man she didn't recognize, a jar of...sea monkeys(?) on one of the shelves, a comically large gavel... she kind of wanted to hear the story behind the stuffed armadillo.  
Behind his desk, playing with a paddle ball of all things, sat Judge Harold T Stone. The man himself looked to be in his late twenties though from what she understood he was in his late thirties instead, his nose slightly upturned and his eyes mischievous beneath the brim of a grey fedora. Neither the Rocky and Bullwinkle tie nor the paddle ball helped to age him at all. The man stopped what he was doing and turned to smile at her, laying his paddle flat upon the desk. "What can I do you for?" he smiled in a genuinely kind manner. Hatti shut the door behind her then cleared her throat, "Judge Stone, I'm Hatti Digger th-"

"That's right, you're the new Baillif!" Harry cut her off, standing up. He made his way around the desk and extended a hand which Hatti accepted, "It's a pleasure sir," she hummed. Hands separated Harry moved to lean against the front of his desk, appraising her with a still kindly stare, "Gee, when I read your file I don't remember reading anything about you having such lovely hair! If you don't mind me saying," he complimented. The Bailiff's eyebrows rose heavenward, "Are you hitting on me sir?" she questioned, voice light with humor. Harry shrugged, hands shoved into his pants' pockets, "Nah."

Hatti covered her mouth with one hand to stop herself from laughing- something she'd deemed entirely inappropriate, "Sir," she exhaled in an attempt to regather her suddenly frayed wits, "I came in here to ask if there's anything I should be looking out for before I-"

Without warning the door behind Hatti opened, nearly slamming into her. She, at the very least, had the presence of mind to quickly move out of the way before it did. "Harry, are we going to start this or what? I've got a date waiting who's all _wound up_ and ready to go if you know what I mean," a male voice cut through Hatti's senses like a hot knife through butter. She turned around to find herself facing a tall gentleman bedecked in a three piece suit complete with pressed handkerchief in his breast pocket. Of course, being 5"4, everyone looked tall to her, yet Hatti could tell that this man must have been somewhere over six foot. The man in question's attention switched from the Judge to her in barely a moment, brown eyes greedily taking in her short stature, curled hair, and unfortunate cleavage which his gaze fixated on for far longer than what was appropriate. Hatti dearly wished she'd changed into her uniform earlier, but it hadn't occurred to her to do so before she'd actually checked out her new place of work. "Him," Harry muttered belatedly. "Woah, hey. Dan Fielding District Attorney," The tall man extended a hand, standing to his full height so that Hatti was stuck looking up his sizeable nose. "Hatti Digger. Baillif," she greeted in return, giving his large hand a jaunty shake. "Baillif," Dan purred, "So we'll be working together a lot," he raised an eyebrow. Unlike the honorable Judge; this man was _most definitely_ hitting on her. "I guess we will," she replied in a falsely smooth tone.

Hatti placed a both hands on her wide hips, lips forming a half smile. Normally she would have disliked the attention but there was something less threatening about this man's intentions that told her nothing truly harmful would come of it. At the very least she would have a gun on her at all times. "I don't know if I'm worth risking your life Mr. Fielding." She hummed ,indicating the danger that would come of chasing her. "I'll be the judge of that," Dan replied, eyes narrowing seductively.  
" _Well_ Miss Digger, I imagine you need to get ready for session! Dan I'll be out in just a minute," Harry cut into the two's conversation, his lisping voice so utterly different from Dan's it startled her. Hatti managed a tight smile, "Right, my apologies sir!" she said quickly, not wanting to start things on the wrong foot. "I'll see both of you later," she waved a hand and departed, feeling the gaze of both men on her back as she left.

After dressing properly in her uniform, receiving her weapon and steeling herself for the hours to come, Hatti reentered the courtroom. The seats had been filled and the other two Bailiffs had taken their places. " _An addition of security in aid of several threats during Criminal Court part 2"_ that's what she was. Looking at the two though, Hatti couldn't imagine anyone risking escape or threatening anyone with them around! The first a woman of about Hatti's height stood in front of the jury box, empty of jury and instead filled with the criminal class. She had dark skin, well styled black hair, and an expression that said "try anything and die". The other, a mountain of a man stood near the left door at the Judge's stand. Pale skin, thick features reminding her of some neanderthal pictures Hatti had seen, and a shaved head to finish off the picture. Sucking in a deep breath Hatti made her way further into the room to stand beside the woman.

Court went into session and Hatti realized two things almost immediately. One: All of her co-workers were insane. And two: She had not been properly trained for this at all! While a lot of the cases were typical- , flashers, hookers (of which Harry seemed friendly), and robbers of varying levels of intensity- there were a few...oddities. Which was putting it lightly. A man in a wingsuit, a can of spray paint, and an ultimate plan to paint a mustache on the statue of liberty (Harry had been rather eager to hear the logistics on that one). A woman claiming to own a psychic chicken that had run amok, and worst of all the depressed looking clown immediately following that case that had a deeply rooted fear of farm fowl which required all the Bailiffs (and later everyone else including the Judge) to join together to attempt to catch both the runaway clown and the angry bird.

After that ordeal Harry, wiping his sweaty brow with the sleeve of his robe, called for lunchbreak. Hatti found herself standing in line with a tray, wondering if anything being served was actually edible. Making a mental note to bring her own lunch next time she took the lasagna and a coffee, paid for it, then scanned the tables in search of an empty table. The Cafeteria was a large enough space, with dingy white and green checkered floor, one wall consumed by large windows looking out into the hallway, and a stand run by a blind man should anyone need the "bare necessities of life".

"Hey Hatti, why don't you join our motley crew?" Harry called from his place at one of the longer tables (which in reality was several small tables pushed together). Hatti smiled, "Only if there's room sir," she replied, taking in the group. Roz and Bull, the two Bailiff's, the Defence Attorney and the Company Clerk as well. Hatti sat herself near the end of the table. "Excuse me, I don't think we've been introduced. Christine Sullivan," the blonde at the opposite end of the table extended a hand which Hatti had to stand up to take. Sitting back down Hatti tucked her skirt as best she could beneath her thighs, "A pleasure," she nodded.  
"And this here is Mac Robinson," Harry added in the ensuing silence. Mac was a dark skinned mustacheod gentleman, wearing a reddish-brown sweater (unbuttoned) and with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He reached out to shake Hatti's hand as well and the young woman noted his strong grip, squeezing firmly in return. "Great, now that you know everyone, why don't you tell us a little something about yourself?" Harry pressed, resting his chin on an upturned palm. Hatti cast a glance at all the others around the table and found their attention completely fixed on her. Swallowing she managed, "I grew up here- that is- in Manhattan. I'm an only child, and I'm a blonde," she smirked crookedly, taking her coffee and sniffing it for fear it was horribly stale.

The attention was then thankfully taken away from Hatti when the great Dan Fielding came up to the table, his untouched hand grasping a brown paper bag with what she assumed was his lunch in it and the other, circled with white bandage, held a steaming coffee mug. He stepped over the back of one chair and plunked himself onto it, pulling a sad looking sandwich out of the bag then discarding said object at his feet. "Your hand ok Dan?" Harry asked, chewing. The Attorney nodded, removing a layer of cellophane with practiced fingers, "Oh yeah sure, it's just a superficial _gaping wound_ ," he made a face that she couldn't interpret, "You know, I want to know why that _thing_ went after me," he bit into his sandwich.  
"I believe I read somewhere that chickens can smell fear, and react accordingly," Hatti supplied, earning her a collection of chuckles from the other members of the table. Dan looked darkly at her, though the woman remained unmoved. "It might also have something to do with you swinging your briefcase at it shouting ' _kill it, kill it!_ '" Harry suggested dryly, raising an eyebrow at the taller man, "I thought you grew up on a farm?"

Hatti tried not to choke on her coffee. He'd grown up on a _farm?_ Huh. Living proof that one should not judge by appearance alone. The man looked as though he'd been born in that suit. "I did," Dan continued, oblivious to Hatti's dumbstruck expression, "We raised Pigs, there's a big difference," he attempted to look above it all, long neck stretched out and shoulders squared. It didn't really work.  
"Well at least we found it," Christine said, bailing her fellow Attorney out. Hatti wrinkled her nose, "Yes. Attempting to nest atop of Bull's head."  
"...Still not the worst toupee I've ever seen."  
"I can't believe you didn't notice Big Guy," Harry grinned, looking across the table at the mountainous Bailiff. Bull shrugged, either oblivious to the fact that he was being made fun of or entirely disinterested in the fact, "I would have noticed, but I was distracted trying to track down the escaped clown!"

It went on like that for a good while. Hatti for the most part only watched, eating her somewhat gummy lasagna and sipping at her coffee. The fact that everyone remained so calm about what was essentially a predatory fowl chasing a criminal clown about the courtroom and down the halls- was very telling. Hatti remembered her training, being told to be prepared for anything. Somehow she didn't think they'd had the chicken in mind.  
There was something frightfully comfortable about being surrounded by these people that made Hatti stop to add her own bits and bobs to the conversation. By the time the meal was over she felt as though she'd known the group far longer than she had. Harry was the first to stand up, running a hand over his comical tie and uttering something to the tune of "Let's get to adjudicate'n." Followed by both Mac and Christine at relatively the same time. Roz stood up without a word, giving Hatti a small smile that didn't extend to her eyes. Distrustful. Hatti couldn't really blame her. Bull stayed put longer than the others to finish his meal and stare at Hatti. Were he not so friendly she might have been a bit weirded out by it. Perhaps she was anyway.

Finally all that was left was Hatti and Dan, the latter finishing up the newspaper he'd only recently retrieved. He folded the paper neatly and looked around, "It seems I've been abandoned," he smirked, directing it at Hatti if only because she was there. "You and me both," she shrugged, sighing contentedly as she climbed to her feet. Dan stood up, once again dwarfing the Bailiff, "This thing had better end soon, wouldn't want Sasha to grow impatient," he checked his watch, "...Sandy? Ah, whatever I'll know when I get there."

Hatti watched as Dan stalked off on his way to the courtroom, something bubbling up in her stomach (luckily not the lasagna) urging her to chase after him instead of following behind at her usual leisurely pace, "Mr Fielding," she called, garnering his attention, "I understand we were joking back there but… is your hand really alright?" she asked earnestly. Looking surprised Dan sucked in a breath, "Uh, yeah- yeah it is," he waggled his fingers a little as if to prove it. "Good." Hatti said with a decisive nod, "I would not want to mercilessly mock you further if you were _really_ hurt." She winked.  
Dan's frown faded, "Hey, it's not like I attacked you first. Even though I have loads of material like oh, I don't know, your hair." The corners of his eyes crinkled pleasantly when he smiled. Hatti couldn't help but admire the soft nature of those eyes.  
"Take that back!" she gasped, punching his arm as light as she could manage. The two broke out in twin grins, Dan's coming off as more light and airy than Hatti's. Belatedly Dan gestured to the open glass doors, "Shall we?" Hatti curtsied awkwardly, "After you."  
"Ha, joke's on you I was going to go first anyway," Dan stuck out his tongue and took up a near trot towards the door. Hatti watched him go for far longer than necessary before following him.

* * *

 **A few notes:**

 **I apologize for the amount of "Tell" instead of "Show" in this chapter -I promise that there is more show in all entries following.** **This story will change perspectives several times, I hope to get every "main" character from the series to say a few words. You may not like Hatti too much at first, she's not a jerk but she's kind of...boring right now. Don't worry that changes (I hope, I hope)**

 **I have five chapters pre-written already, I should update once a week and hopefully that will give me time to write more chapters (I am notoriously slow haha).**

 **Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated! I want to get this right, so go ahead and rag on me just don't tell me "This sucks" without telling me why.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Getting to know you**

Dan's date admittedly had gone more than a little awry, and rather quickly at that. He should have known that her name was Sarah _._ With that unfortunate beginning there was a subsequently _speedy_ end to the evening when she spurned his advances with a slap. Of course he'd made sure to tell everyone that things had gone differently. _Very_ differently. Dan had to admit he _might_ have gone a bit too far, but the collective groans from everyone merely drove him forward into his lude narrative. In the end it was Hatti's, "Will you see her again Mr. Fielding?" that made him stop.

Roughly a week later (a week filled with far more satisfactory dalliances) Dan found the rare night where yet again he was alone. That morning, due to a lack of funds, breakfast ended up being half bowl of bland oatmeal (whether or not he played a drum solo on the quaker container is really none of your business) and his car later came to a smoking halt at the courthouse where a bird promptly dootied on the windshield. He made a mental note to have Phil clean it up, only to remember that the Bum had gone off to get his dry cleaning. Which he couldn't afford. Knowing Phil the dunce wouldn't think to pay for it with his own blood, and would need prompting later on.  
By the time he had reached the eighteenth floor Dan's mood had been entirely ruined. Face set in permanent pout, he made his way through the halls -decidedly walked towards the courtroom in search of Bull or perhaps Christine. What was the use of a bad mood if he couldn't take it out on one of his friends? Coming to the cafeteria doors Dan found an older gentleman dressed in dirty clothing and sporting a pair of smudged sunglasses. Hooked on one finger was a metal cup which he held out in hopes of receiving "donations". Finding the beggar to be in the way of his rampage the ADA frowned, "Move over grandpa," he spat, absently putting out a hand to pinch a golden dollar he saw in the metal cup, thinking bitterly to himself that he deserved it.

"Mister Fielding, are you stealing from a _blind man_?!"

Caught out Dan spun around to find Hatti Digger standing with hands on her wide hips and judgement in her eyes. He was confused to find her thin painted lips pressed into a tolerating sort of smile that didn't quite fit her words. One look at his surroundings told him that he was being watched by more than just the blonde Bailiff and a certain shameful heat crept up his long neck. Of course he was more frustrated that he'd been caught out. "What? No! I was-...uh-" he cut off to drop the coin back into the cup, the sound rattling the rest of the change inside. Hatti raised an eyebrow, still smiling. Feeling oddly awkward beneath her scrutiny he shoved a long fingered hand into his pocket and pulled out yet another coin, plopping that into the cup as well then clapping the gentleman on his disgusting shoulder, "Don't spend it all in one place." The beggar felt around, "Oh gee, a whole nickel," he muttered dryly, "Now I can finally afford that eye surgery."

Dan's posture collapsed as he glared, making a sour face that no one else could see at the wretch before turning towards Hatti who stood as though waiting for him.

"I'm sorry I yelled." She didn't look sorry at all. Dan shrugged. With the disapproval completely disappeared from the Bailiff's face, Hatti had only a smile for him that extended to her oceanic blue eyes. Finding his mood oddly restored, and with the watchers moving on to something more interesting, Dan allowed a smile of his own. Hatti began walking to the courtroom double doors, turning back and giving him a look that said "are you coming?". The Attorney hastened to follow, easily catching up on his long legs. Coming to a halt behind the short woman he caught a whiff of her scent. Green apple shampoo if he were to hazard a guess, no perfume. She stepped aside to stand at the door, the movement shifting the golden curls surrounding her round face. Dan poked his tongue against the inside of his cheek, shuffling past her to his table and plopping his briefcase atop it. He clicked open the object with two (no longer bandaged) hands, savoring the sound it made. It had lasted for a year thus far and with all luck would not be shot, puked in, or otherwise destroyed for many years to come or until he decided to buy something sleeker and wildly more expensive.

The sound of heavy footsteps brought the ADA's attention up from the file in his hand to Bull making his way across the room to Miss Digger.  
"Hi," Bull waved a giant hand at her. Hatti's mouth quirked into her usual crooked smirk that suggested both a fondness and a desire to get away from you at the same time, "Mr. Shannon," she greeted pleasantly. Dan shifted his position so that he was half looking at the two and half looking at his file, hoping to appear disinterested in the conversation underway.

"You can call me Bull if you like," the tall Bailiff said, bringing his hands together in front of him.  
"Is that... really your name?"  
"Oh yeah!" Bull replied. The silence that followed was distinctly uncomfortable for those _not_ involved. Dan sniffed carelessly, flipping up a page then letting it fall with one flick of his finger. "So Hatti," Bull began again. He said her name like "Haddy" which made Dan internally bristle for reasons he couldn't- or wouldn't- tall Bailiff remained utterly clueless and continued, "I was wondering if you'd like to go out to dinner with me or...something. After session," he stumbled. Hatti looked blankly up at him, "Oh."

 _Say no. You can do better. WAY better!_ Dan's thoughts shouted. Despite that, Hatti kept smiling, tucking a lock of golden hair behind her ear. "I'm flattered Mr.- Uh, Bull. Unfortunately I am not in the least interested in a romantic relationship right now. If this is on a friendly capacity-"

"No, that's ok," Bull hastened to tell her looking bashful, "I was just asking 'cause -you know- you're new and all," he stretched out his long neck so that he appeared to be a turtle coming freshly out of its shell.  
"I would like to go out if you're still interested," Hatti said with a nod, "I'm unsure about dinner...how do you feel about the museum? Tomorrow they're having a special Van Gogh exhibit and I intended to go anyway," she offered. Dan's insides stirred against his will at the sudden passion that filled her voice at the mention of the painter. Usually her voice matched her words- prim, proper, and otherwise dull. She liked art hm? Mentally he catalogued that beside the green apple shampoo.  
Bull stared at her, "Ooo-kay," he saluted with two fingers, then turned to lumber after Roz who had just entered and taken her place before the jury box.

Hatti blew out a breath she'd clearly been holding, stepping towards the barrier and stopping at the gate. "So you're going out with Bull the wonder dunce?" Dan asked, not looking up. He raised a questioning eyebrow at the pages. Hatti frowned, "It's not really your business Mr. Fielding."

"It is my business if you break his heart and he ends up moping all session," Dan replied hotly.  
"I will admit that I'm flattered," she ignored his temper, "One does like to be noticed once in awhile."  
" _One does like to be noticed,"_ Dan mocked in a falsetto voice, waving a limp wristed hand, "What are you _nuts_?" he stood from his chair, twisted around, and slumped atop the table so that he was level with her, "He's a walking freakshow! If you want to be noticed by someone, why not me?" he traced pale fingers down his silken red tie. Hatti scoffed, "I _was_ noticed by you last night if I recall when you called out, and I quote: "Hey Miss Digger. Nice Bazooms!"" the tone of her voice went down an octave in direct contrast with the voice Dan had used, one thick eyebrow rising upwards.

Alright so perhaps that one hadn't come out as he'd planned. In his defense, she did have some pretty great bazooms.

Dan chuckled defensively and kicked out one long leg, narrowly missing the Bailiff's left knee, "That was a joke! Hey, if you can't take a joke I don't even know why we talk to each other." He crossed his arms awkwardly, stretching out his considerable spine. (And people said he had no backbone. Hah!) Hatti shrugged, the corners of her eyes crinkling as she turned her gaze to the short wooden gate. Dan tilted his head in an attempt to gather her attention but failed. So instead he ogled her. Though perhaps, just this time, it could be considered admiring. Hatti was short, her head only coming up to his chest. Her round pale face showed little emotion but she was pretty enough. He decided a certain amount of blankness meant less frown lines or wrinkles in the forehead. Blueish-greenish eyes and long mascara'd lashes, blond hair parted just a little bit off scenter. She had a decent figure too, perhaps a bit heavier than he usually liked, but with curve (completely hidden by her uniform) and an ample enough bosom to pull it off. Dan had just come to the conclusion that she was worth his attention when his thoughts were cut off by Bull.

"All rise! Criminal Court part two is now in session. Judge Harold T. Stone presiding!"

Hatti looked up, hands moving to pull at an accidental fold in her skirt. Dan swallowed, his mouth dry. "Mr. Fielding," the young woman bobbed her head in a brief goodbye. "Uh, Hatti…" the ADA said rising to his feet and catching her arm just as she began to walk away. This did not go unnoticed by Christine who looked confused in Dan's peripherals and most certainly not by Harry who would likely interrogate him later. Still he felt that he had to say something, frightfully aware of Hatti's discomfort at being restricted in such a manner but unable to remove his hand. Several thoughts came to mind, questions he wanted to ask, statements he wanted to make. They all flew out the window. Unused to being so flustered Dan's mouth opened and closed a few times like a goldfish's, until he finally found footing on something not totally inappropriate.

"Call me Dan."

* * *

"And may I say girls, that while I enjoy a good Chorus Line as much as the next guy... Perhaps it might behoove you to wear some _clothes_ if you intend on doing that sort of thing in public?" Harry banged his gavel, "Alright folks that's lunch!"

Dan watched the women leave, humming pleasurably, "I should really catch their show," he purred. It was truly a shame they had to be dressed when they were brought in. As an unnamed Bailiff lead the last indecent stragglers from the courtroom Harry waved a hand at Dan who, having nothing to stare at, had begun to pack files back into his briefcase. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Hatti, looking as though she wanted to follow him should he start towards the cafeteria. Something about that struck him though he, of course disregarded that feeling as soon as it arrived. Instead he made an over the top gesture towards Harry and indicated that she should go ahead without them, aware that he looked like a loon but not in the least bothered by that fact because… well, because of Hatti mostly. She actually opened her mouth when she smiled that time, as though she intended to laugh but couldn't force it out of her.

Dan walked up to the bench to stand beside Christine, invading her personal space so that their shoulders nearly touched, earning him nothing more than an annoyed glare. Harry pulled his robe open and pulled it off his thin frame, "I saw you talking to Miss Digger before session." he draped the robe over the arm of his chair.  
"And?" Dan questioned, "Am I not allowed to talk to people now?...Sir." he hiccoughed into his fist. Harry scowled, "What I meant to say, or ask really, was whether you intended to uh... " he shot a look at Christine that suggested he didn't want to say anything improper. " _Bop her_?" Dan couldn't help but snap. He hated beating around the bush, especially when he was hungry and had managed to snag a piece of chocolate cream pie from a "generous" (read: exploitable) Bull. "Not to seem disrespectful Harry but what's it to you?"  
"I just don't want you to hurt her. I've only known her for a few days but she seems sweet and maybe a bit naive. Not to mention I would rather she not stop working here just because you neglected to call her afterwards or whatever else," The Judge leaned forwards in his chair, crossing his arms on the surface of his bench. Dan pursed his lips, feeling slightly hurt by the implication that he would ever mistreat his new acquaintance. Still, he had to admit he'd been thinking about... _it_. The only women he'd never thought about "doing the dance" with tended to be uggos and Roz who frightened him too much for him to even consider. "I agree with Harry," Christine said tucking a lock of hair behind her ear, a blush having crept across her perfect features, "Not that I don't think she can't handle herself-"

"Hey!" Dan yelped, affronted, "You act like I'm going to force myself on her like some sort of sicko!" a red heat climbed up his neck and he dearly hoped it didn't show. "Look, I'm not going to touch Hatti Digger unless she says it's ok, got it? Then it's strictly _our business_. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some important," he paused, " _eating_ to do." With as much dignity as Dan could muster (a surprising amount), he stormed off.

* * *

 **Not the happiest with the start of this chapter, but I like the end so... I hope I got Dan's personality right, I explore his POV quite a few times. ;)  
I've decided I'll update every Saturday, for those wondering.**

 **Has anyone else noticed that Bull has a thing for curly blonde haired women?**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Attraction**

Hatti decided that she enjoyed Bull's company. While he had a very loose grasp on art in general and what constituted "good" art in at least Hatti's mind, he was a great listener. "What was your favorite piece do you think Mr. - _Bull_ ," she internally chastised herself for making the mistake again. For the longest time the only people she talked to were not the sort you were on a first name basis with. Her father on numerous occasions had told her that respect took you a long way and that immediately calling someone by their first without asking was taking _far_ too many liberties. "I liked the one with the shoe. Reminded me of a shoe I found in our front yard when I was a kid. To do this day I still don't know who it belonged to," he smiled, looking pleased with his answer. Hatti quelled the desire to laugh, "I see," she hummed. The two entered the rather cavernous elevator, Bull smashing the button for the eighteenth floor with the side of his fist. Hatti folded her hands in front of her and closed her was something about the weightless, dizzying feeling the it provided that she enjoyed and wanted to savor. Bull had started to hum "The Girl from Ipanema" which in her mind was appropriate elevator music. They stopped a few times to pick up either court goers or someone from the Records Department she only vaguely recognized. Finally they reached their destination and both Hatti and the bald Bailiff stepped out into the hallway.

Another nice thing about walking with Bull was that people gave them a wide berth, Hatti felt as though she didn't have to look where she was going. They turned a corner, walking beside the glass revealing the Cafeteria. Just up ahead she saw the shoeshine stand and so if she remembered correctly around the right corner were some payphones. Speaking of- "Hey Hatti!"  
Hatti stopped walking just in front of the ADA, "Yes Dan?" she didn't linger on her ability to say _his_ first name. Dan sat with a newspaper in his hands which he folded and flattened on his lap, an elderly sort of gentleman shining his already perfect shoes. Bull offered something between a smile and a grimace in his direction, she wondered just how long they'd known each other. "So, how was your _date_?" Dan smirked in a self-satisfied manner, reminding her of a cat with a freshly caught mouse. "It wasn't a date," came Hatti's terse reply, "And it went marvelously," she shot her fellow Bailiff an appreciative look and Bull beamed at her in return. Dan wrinkled his nose at them, "Please, spare me any details."  
"Oh come on Dan, it was great! " Bull admonished, "I got to see a painting of a shoe, and Van Gogh's three bedroom scenes-"  
"Woah, maybe I should have gone, sounds kinky," his shoes finished Dan sprang from his chair, "Put it on my tab, K?" he patted the older man on the cheek and winked at him. Hatti found his behaviour slightly odious but couldn't deny actually liking the idea of him joining their little walk and talk. "You would have enjoyed it," she commented calmly. As he approached she caught a whiff of his cheap cologne, the smell catching her by surprise and causing her to hesitate before adding, "There were quite a few naked statues."  
Dan grinned, "You read me like a book," he bumped his shoulder (or as close as he could manage) against hers. Hatti had never really been fond of physical contact unless she was the one to initiate it but decided it wasn't the worst experience. "Only because you are a _picture book_ ," she returned with a sly smile, Dan for his part put on an expression of mock outrage, complete with hands on hips. Bull watched their conversation like a spectator at a ping-pong match, mouth hanging open as it usually did.

In the moment of silence that followed Hatti almost expected something insane to happen. Like Harry skating down the halls or the arrival of a gorilla wearing a helicopter beanie. Instead she found her blue eyes meeting Dan's brown, and something clicked. Mind you it was a small click. Completely insignificant. Hatti by all means should have just ignored it and returned to her friendly banter with the Attorney, but for some reason her brain lacked cutting words. He was...rather handsome wasn't he. Dan's soul searching gaze turned confused and he shot a worried glance at Bull, "What is- is there something in my eye? A hair out of place?" he ran his fingers first across closed lids then through his dark, greying hair.  
Hatti blinked stupidly, opening her mouth. Ugh, how plebian of her to lose all semblance of control! "No I-" Hatti was then saved, or perhaps condemned by the sudden excited squeal of:

"Danny!"

A tall brunette wearing far too much leopard print rushed over with hands out on either side of her as if for balance. She nearly bowled over the Attorney, meeting his pale lips with her colored ones, cupping his face with both hands. Dan cradled her hips and eagerly returned the kiss. Hatti likened the motion to digging for gold. She watched with a blank expression, not entirely sure how to feel about it. Should she be embarrassed? Angry? Bull clearly didn't either and he shared an eye roll with his fellow Bailiff. Liplock released Dan gasped for breath, wiping lipstick off his mouth with pale fingers and bending at the waist to grin at the new woman. "Katherine Hopkins." He looked at Hatti as he said it, like he'd just remembered she was there. It took a moment for her to realize he was _introducing them._ "Come on Danny," purred the woman, tugging at his tie with her pointer finger, "All my friends call me Kitty." Bull chuckled, only to find no one else joining in- it petered off rather quickly. Hatti cordially extended a hand to the new woman to shake, only to find her offer ignored. Katherine draped an arm over Dan's shoulder and came close to his face as though she was going to kiss him again, "So… how about tonight? I've learned a few new tricks, since we last 'talked'," her eyes narrowed to punctuate her suggestive statement. Was this really happening? Hatti at least thought that Fielding's dates would have the sense not to proposition him with two people standing so close! Dan oozed charm as he ran his hand through the other woman's dark hair, tilting his head. "Actually... I can't."

"What?"  
"Pardon?"

Both Hatti and Katherine spoke at the same time with equal amounts of disbelief. She allowed her surprise to settle and she cleared her throat, hoping her face wasn't turning red. Dan adjusted his tie with both hands, and continued to adjust it as he spoke. "I have something else planned," he explained. Katherine pouted, "Tomorrow?"  
"Nnnnope. And before you ask, not the day after either," the Attorney casually flipped Katherine's hair and stepped back. Hatti swallowed, suddenly aware of soft chocolate shaded eyes focussing on her again, "Miss Digger. Shall we?" he gestured to the double doors. What an...odd occurrence. The short Bailiff allowed a tight smile, "Of course, Mr. Fielding," she curtsied awkwardly. Katherine er, Kitty looked confused and marginally annoyed, "But- Danny! What?"

He was already through the door. True to form he didn't hold it open for Hatti, she rolled her eyes and followed him.

Behind her she heard Bull say, "I'm available."

* * *

Hatti lead a drunk man towards the courtroom, silently musing over the sudden attraction she felt for Dan. It wasn't as though she hadn't found him handsome before, she did after all, have a thing for tall men, and those well dressed now that she thought about it. It was just that… before it had been a friendly observation. Like how she felt about Harry or Mac (and to some extent, Bull). Somehow Dan was different, if only she could figure it out.  
Trying hard to ignore the rancid smell of the man held at an arm's length in front of her, she forced herself to remember Dan's cologne. It was sharp like nail polish remover but by far she preferred it to the stench of regurgitated alcohol. "Hey, you ain't half bad sweet cheeks," slurred Bil (short for Bilius if you can believe it) Bloke, stumbling none too inconspicuously in order to touch her. Hatti shook him sharply which snapped his head straight, "Eyes forward please," she said tersely. "I was jus' sayin'." the man pouted.

They entered the courtroom where the previous defendant was being "helped" back the direction she'd just come from. Hatti guided Bilius to the bench, depositing him in the space between Dan and Christine who perused already checked files before beginning. Hatti took her place beside Roz, gaze not leaving the tall ADA. Her fingers traced a circle on the outside of her thigh, lost in her own mind.  
"So you like him I take it." Startled by the quiet voice the blonde Bailiff nearly jumped. Instead, she turned her head to Roz, the owner of that voice. "Mr. Bloke?" she joked half heartedly, watching the man grovel before an unimpressed Harry. He was balding, sweaty, unshaven, and had two chins when he opened his mouth to whine. Thinking those things were disgusting wasn't exactly a good start to a relationship.

Roz snorted, which she hoped meant that the stoic woman was amused. "Nah, he's way out of your league," she glanced at Hatti who tried to hide her own mirth.

Dan's voice rose as he argued with Christine, the file flapping back and forth as he made his point. "I assume then, that you are referring to Mr. Fielding."

Roz shrugged, "Unless you have a thing for Harry." Hatti hesitated. Mr. Bloke started waving his arms and both Bailiff's tensed in preparation to restrain him, only to be beaten to the punch by Bull. Dan leaned backwards away from the man's grimy swinging hands, disgust showing in every line of his oddly handsome face. "How did you know?" Hatti asked after she felt sufficiently sure the situation was under control. Roz's face remained emotionless as she said, "I saw you in the lunch line yesterday, checking out his butt." Hatti's eyes widened. _Had she done that?_ Lost for words she adjusted her gaze to the floor. "I don't blame you," Roz continued after a pause, "It's not bad. If only it didn't come with a personality," suddenly one corner of her mouth upturned in a genuine smile, eyes still emotionless in comparison. The pale Bailiff chuckled as quietly as she could manage, "The worst part of this, I admit, is that I... I believe it's worth it. Do you think that makes me stupid?"

Roz watched Dan with her mouth still stretched into a smile, only Hatti noted that at that moment it could be described as almost fond. She wondered at that, but didn't dare voice the internal question. Roz was a deadly weapon when she wanted to be, and no matter how well trained Hatti was, there was no way she was going to misstep! "Nah," Roz admitted, "tasteless, but not stupid."

With that it seemed the conversation was over. Hatti silently mused over her co-worker's sudden talkativeness and realized she had nothing. Harry banged his gavel and the next case went underway.

* * *

Dan had never before felt nervous about asking out a woman.

Well, except maybe Christine. Good ol' Christine who worked with and drooled over every day. Whose apparent prerogative was to see past other's imperfections and find the good person inside. At the very least he'd been able to rescue his feelings by saving her from choking and guilting her into a...date? Sort of. He wrinkled his nose in remembrance, the confession of his burgeoning feelings and how she seemed to really understand him in that moment...BUT, that wasn't the point. The point was that he desired the elusive Hatti Digger and her quiet snarkiness.

Finishing up the final case with "attila the nun", Dan rushed back to his desk to pack his files. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hatti begin her march out of the courtroom and he quickened his pace. Snapping closed his briefcase he started after her, easily catching up to the short woman. Hatti stopped and turned to face him, having noticed his presence. The smile that tugged at her mouth was familiar and oh so kind it nearly made him turn around and make a run for something less real.

"Dan," she greeted, "I wanted to thank you earlier for turning down that other woman's...offer."  
"I- what?" How on earth did she know? Dropping Kitty had been surprisingly easy in comparison to his plans. With practiced fingers Hatti began to remove the thick outer layer of her uniform, leaving her in a white, long sleeved button up shirt, and draped the dark fabric over her arm. It fit her nicely and Dan found himself helplessly staring at the gentle curve of her heavy frame and the push of her breasts on the fabric. She looked soft and warm and just… Hatti.

"I assumed you were turning her down for my benefit. It was a rather uncomfortable situation," The Bailiff admitted, when she shrugged her shoulders seemed to disappear in her thick, poofy, hair. She thought he was being friendly? If Dan had no control over his otherwise tumultuous emotions he might have laughed right then.

For a moment they only stared at each other, her oceanic eyes met Dan's and his courage yet again fled for the hills. He idly scratched at the collar of his shirt, fighting the urge to mess with his silken tie as he often did, "Yeah, uh, you're welcome." The short Bailiff nodded. Again silence. "It was...nice talking to you," Hatti finally said, thick eyebrows drawing together in confusion at his out of character silence.

"Hold it," he took her arm, which again made her tense up. She nearly made move to hit him (he thought she must have a good amount of muscle to do her job) which would have been a poor start, but stopped herself mid swing. "So uh, Hatti I was-" he cleared his throat. Why was this so hard anyways? Perhaps it was the certainty of it. With other women, if he asked and they said no he considered it a challenge- make what you will of his morality. With Hatti there was no amount of badgering that would change her No into a Yes.

"Would you like to go out to dinner with me?"

Dan stared blankly at the Bailiff. Those words that he'd been trying to say for the past five minutes had just come out of _Hatti's_ mouth. He floundered for a moment before he uttered a swift, "Yes, yes sure!" he released her arm and hugged himself awkwardly, "Tomorrow, six? I'll pick you up."

Hatti smiled brightly, "It's a date," she searched the pocket of her jacket and found a piece of paper, Dan offered her a pen. Against the wall she wrote her address and apartment number then passed it to the Attorney. "Goodbye Dan," she waved a hand and walked off. With his pen. Dan watched her for a moment then, with a burst of energy, spun on his heel and began a half dance-half walk in the opposite direction.

* * *

 **If this inspires people to read some more, the next chapter is over four-thousand words :D**

 **Reviews are appreciated, especially critiques!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Rules and Regulations**

Hatti surveyed herself in front of the tall mirror that hung on the outside of her bathroom door. Placing one hand on her ample hip she stuck out her left leg through the slit in her simple pale green dress. A golden curl fell over her shoulder and she twisted it around the finger of her free hand. " _Gorgeous"_ she decided with a wry, private smile. Walking through her living room to the front door, and her shoes, she slipped on her favorite black flats. She'd never been one for high heels.  
5:59 read the clock resting on the fireplace mantel, Dan would be there soon. Hatti sucked in a calming breath through her nose and released it slowly through the mouth. It had been months since she'd last had a date, and even then Ryan had only lasted a few weeks. Hatti plucked her dark jacket off the arm of her sofa, lifting it over the side table (complete with phone) and into her arms.

As if by magic there came a zealous knock. Fluffing her hair with one hand the Bailiff rushed to the door and pulled it open. The first thing she was greeted with was not Dan Fielding, rather a bouquet of flowers which were pushed towards her nose. Hatti staggered back a step, looking upwards to meet the smiling Attorney's gaze. "I brought you these," he said simply, stepping into the room without being invited. Hatti rolled her eyes, "Yes I can see that," she closed the door behind her guest. The smell of roses seemed to fill the entire room immediately, overwhelming and unwanted. Hatti of course remained silent in her discomfort and accepted the gift from her date, "Thank you," she said kindly, before heading towards the kitchen.

Dan looked around the cozy living room with unbridled curiosity, his hands coming together behind his back as he not-so-casually observed her dappled grey carpet (the scratchiest one her Landlord could find) and her tasteful (or tasteless, depending) collection of Van Gogh prints which she'd scattered about the place with reckless abandon, all hanging on her light blue walls. Hatti observed the man over the counter separating her kitchen and her living room as she filled a dusty and chipped vase (a gift from her mother) with water, then slid the roses carefully into it. Her home was the pinnacle of tidiness, it always was. Dan ran a hand across the back of her cream colored couch as he walked past, showing off long pale fingers with well trimmed nails. Hatti placed the vase to the right of the sink.

"This is a nice place," Dan said. Hatti smiled faintly,"Thank you," she repeated, "I dislike the color of the walls but I did my best."  
"I uh, take it you like old One-ear," added the ADA as he pointed at the fabled"Shoe" painting that Bull had mentioned, "I bet you have Starry Night over your bed," he smirked. Hatti couldn't help but internally bristle at the way he seemed to brush off the famous artist. She walked over to him, setting the vase on the side table next to her couch. She hated to admit that he was right about the Starry Night print.  
Either noticing her distress, or realizing he was getting nowhere the way he was going, Dan shrugged and turned to her. He scrutinized her like the painting, long tongue poking against the inside of his cheek as he did so. As if the thought only just then struck him he took her hand with gentle fingers and kissed the back, "You look...stunning," he purred, his eyes narrowing as he grinned pleasurably at her. Hatti finally allowed herself to smile, "I know," she fluffed her hair for effect. She wanted to tell him that he looked quite fetching himself in his black suit with blue patterned tie, handkerchief folded to have three points in his breast pocket. Unfortunately she couldn't seem to voice it. "Shall we?" Dan gestured to the front door in one grand sweeping motion.

"But of course."

* * *

The restaurant was not quite as "high end" as Hatti had been expecting- not to say that she was disappointed. She admired the cozy atmosphere that enveloped her. The tables were round with lit candles flickering in the middle of each one, walls a dark wood and floors carpeted red. Waiters rushed back and forth, not acknowledging the new arrivals and probably wouldn't until they were seated. Dan pulled Hatti's chair out for her, pushing her unceremoniously back to the table with a grunt. She snorted in the most ladylike fashion possible, putting her elbows on the table and tucking her folded hands beneath her chin. Dan sat across from her, taking up a tall menu. They remained silent until a waiter came to them and took their drink orders, once that had occurred the tension seemed to melt. Hatti briefly perused her menu before turning her gaze to her date, "Have you ever been in love before?"

Dan stared.

It took a moment for the Bailiff to realize what she'd just said and she yelped, "Jesus, hardly a first date question," she chuckled weakly without smiling. One hand went up to cradle her forehead. She was far too out of practice for this! Dan waved it off in one casual motion, "Don't worry about it. I'm not… there was one person but clearly it didn't work out," he coughed into his hand. Hatti looked up and tilted her head, "What happened?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," he dismissed just as easily. It was clear he wasn't going to elaborate so Hatti allowed the topic to slide.

The drinks were dropped off and their food orders taken. Dan's eyes sparkled in the candlelight, thin lips pressed together. Hatti tucked a lock of hair behind her ear only for it to pop out again and tickle her cheek. Her date's expression became more amused and without warning he extended a hand to brush back that same blonde curl. Hatti visibly tensed but allowed him to finish the motion, her heart seeming to lurch in her chest. He settled back down.

"So... you like art huh?" Hatti rolled her eyes, "Yes. Imagine that," she sipped her wine, the color matching the current shade of her lips. Dan tapped a finger several times on the tabletop, "So...when did you figure that out?"  
Hatti leaned back in her chair, pleased to have been asked that question even if it was a half hearted attempt at a conversation starter. "I was nine," she spoke softly as she recalled, "My father was and still is a professor at a nearby college and my mother a beautician. We were too poor for either of them to leave their employment and my mother never trusted babysitters or nannies." She traced a finger around the rim of her glass, deep in thought, "For two hours after I returned from school I was left alone in our apartment. In that time I would look through my father's library. One day I came to find a book titled 'Famous Artists through the Ages' or something of that sort. When I opened it… there was a self portrait by Van Gogh." She remembered staring at the picture, her thumb flicking the corner of the page but never fully turning it. That painting had looked almost three dimensional, with deep eyes and a serious expression. It was as though he was looking into her soul."Further perusal of the pages proved art, mostly paintings, to be my passion."

She looked up from her glass and found Dan staring thoughtfully at her, something unreadable in his expression. He swallowed thickly, "So- so why did you become a Bailiff?"

Hatti blinked, "Why did _you_ become a lawyer?" she shot back with a superior smile, the look frustratingly remaining on Dan's face. Even worse, it deepened. "Because… I never wanted to be anything else. I don't think I could ever have been _anything else_."

Hatti found it frustratingly hard to breathe. The timbre of his voice was low enough only for her to hear, his eyes dark and filled with meaning. Despite herself Hatti's lips formed a comforting smile. Dan looked uncomfortable with the admission he'd just made, sliding thumb and forefinger across the dark blue fabric of his tie and stretching out his neck. "Actually that's a lie," he said with a forced chuckle, "When I was two I wanted to be a pig, and I've been tossing around the idea of becoming a Judge for years now."  
Hatti's eyebrows rose towards her hairline, "I see," she hummed, allowing another sip of her beverage, cooling her nerves.

A waiter arrived with their dinner orders. Plate before her Hatti picked at a broccoli floret with her fork. She found herself idly fixed on the candle's shifting flame, her thoughts following a similar pattern. She wondered about Bull and whether he would be upset that she'd turned him down- citing that she wasn't looking for romantic involvement (which she really hadn't been)- and then had gone on a date with Dan Fielding of all people. Bull was by all means forgiving, but easy to upset in the first place. She wondered who would know, and how many lectures she would receive. At least one from Harry, she assumed, and maybe Christine. Not that it was any of their business, which she would gladly tell them.

Reality settled in and Hatti realized that Dan had been talking in one of his more seductive tones, "-and a bottle of Chatuea-Labido?"

Chateau _what_? Hatti curled her fingers beneath her palm, "Pardon?" she exhaled, feeling guilty. Now was not the time to think about her other co-workers. Dan hesitated, "I was just wondering if you'd like to come home with me, maybe curl up in front of the fireplace," his gaze searched her form hungrily. _Oh_. Hatti let her fork rest against the edge of her plate and shook her head, curls bouncing, "Dan, there is something I should probably discuss with you." His expression became apprehensive, "Um, ok." His fingers found his napkin which he idly played with. Hatti's resolve hardened and she straightened her posture. "I have two rules in regards to dating that I feel I must uphold." she explained calmly. Her date hummed, "I can understand that. Alright, shoot."  
"Are you sure you want that?" joked the Bailiff, raising a thick eyebrow. "Depends on what your demands are," he returned just as easily, crossing one leg lazily over the other. Hatti crossed her arms atop the table, the cloth soft against her skin. The smell of melted wax, good food, and cheap cologne mingled with her shampoo and conditioner to make an altogether nauseating odor. For a moment she thought she heard the low lilt of classical music in the background, not caring for it she returned her attention to Dan. "My first rule is...exclusivity."

Dan shrugged, "Fair enough," he agreed, picking up his glass and taking his first drink of the night. Hatti tapped an uneven rhythm on her wrist, "And the second is that, for personal reasons, I don't have sex with the person I am dating until three months into the relationship."

In hindsight she probably should have waited until he'd finished drinking.

Dan spat wine across the table, speckling the pale cloth with pink. Hatti was grateful it didn't quite reach her and left her nicest dress unstained. Her eyes widened at the disbelief and, dare she say it, _anger_ that seemed to take over Dan's person. "What?!" he said, his voice rising. Hatti cast a glance at the surrounding tables to ensure no one had heard his outburst. "I'm sorry if this upsets you-"  
"Upset isn't the right word," he replied stiffly, brushing the wet spots on the tablecloth with the back of his fingers. "I would understand if that is too much to ask of you, I just thought you should know," Hatti tried to hide the concern behind her words. Dan stood up, palms pressed against the edge of the table, " _Who do you think I am_? You could have told me this before I took you out on a date," Dan continued, waving an arm in a wide arc, "I should have gone out with Kitty Hopkins, at least she knows what she's doing!"

"I refuse to be talked down to," Hatti rose to her feet, for the first time annoyed at the height difference, "Don't you dare act as though going out with you is an honor you've afforded to me!" Her face burned as several of their fellow restaurant goers began looking at the two. They must have been a confusing sight, standing and glaring daggers at each other over the table. Dan silently fumed, jaw muscles shifting beneath his skin. Thoroughly in a lather the Bailiff frowned at her "date", "I did _not_ think this would be such a problem." Why hadn't she?  
"Yeah, well, it is. How fun it must have been to drag me down here only to drop this bombshell. See you later _Haddy_ ," looking very much like a petulant child the Lawyer pulled at the jacket of his suit then turned and stormed off. Hatti looked on, dumbfounded. If ever there was an overreaction that had to be it. He... was overreacting wasn't he? Hatti slumped into her chair, pulling a face at her plate. Then it struck her.

"Dan Fielding don't you dare leave me to pay for this!"

He was already gone.

* * *

"Can you believe the nerve of that woman? Luring me out on a date, acting all charming and witty and then WHAM! She punches a hole right into my plans!"

Dan paced agitatedly back and forth in Harry's office, the Judge leaning back in his comfortable chair and watching his friend with a mixture of amusement and disgust, neither trumping the other. In his hands he played with the buttons of his concertina accordion, having been trying for the past half hour play "La Cucaracha" to little success. "Y'know, I don't really understand what the problem is," Harry said as soon as the Lawyer had stopped to take a breath, "Are we talking about Miss Digger?"  
The Lawyer stopped his pacing to look at Harry, "Yes, haven't you been listening?" he flopped onto the green couch, crossing one long leg over the other and folding his hands atop his lap. He looked at his right shoe, as if it could solve his problems for him. Harry set aside the accordion to look at his subordinate, torn between feeling sorry for the man and glad that he was getting what he normally deserved. "She seems like a nice person," Harry said with a cute little smile. The sigh that followed ended in a rumble, "She is."  
"So?" Harry prodded, leaning forward, "What happened?" he searched the other man's face for an answer but found none. It was always a pain to go back and forth between Dan's explosive behaviour and the toned down sombre feelings he could express in equal measure. The ADA leaned his head back to look at the dingy ceiling, "So... like I told you, she decided to ruin the evening. Three months Harry, _three months!_ Now, you know me, do you think I could possibly get through three months without sex?"  
Harry hated those kind of questions. "Well uh-"  
"The answer is no," Dan cut him off, slicing a pale hand through the air like a knife while still staring at what must have been a fabulous constellation of dead bugs on the ceiling, "I barely made it two weeks! I couldn't possibly do that for her." His voice had gone oddly gentle and Harry found within it the crux of the matter.

Standing up the Judge approached his friend, plopping himself down on the arm of his slick green cough and bringing his hands together between his knees. _Normally_ he didn't like to butt into such matters, but since Dan had come to him first he decided it was acceptable to offer the man some friendly advice. "I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit here. I think if Miss Digger really means that much to you, you could do anything."  
Dan turned his head slowly, "Yeah maybe," he huffed, "But what if it isn't worth it?" Harry tutted, "You'll just have to find that out. You like her right?"  
"Right."  
"Then do something about it," Harry patted the other man's knee then stood up again, "If you don't you might regret it."

Harry's words ran through Dan's head in seemingly eternal repeat throughout the rest of the day. " _If you don't you might regret it"_ Regretting wasn't so bad was it? He'd done many a thing he later wished he hadn't and it hadn't killed him… well, there were a few close calls but that was beside the point. Going through session was mind numbing whereas normally he delighted in the challenge. Christine had even put up more of a fight than usual, or maybe his beleaguered mind made it out to be that way. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hatti standing tall(-ish), shoulders squared and jaw set. She looked important, even more so standing beside Bull whose eyes looked vacant and whose mouth hung open. Idiot.  
Dan didn't get to eat with Hatti, instead distracted by a tall blonde in tall stiletto heels and no panties. Some unneeded flirtation later he had her in the closet, at the brink. The first buttons had just come undone on his shirt and Petunia's lips were on his neck when something inside Dan snapped. It was almost as though he'd heard it, like a twig breaking in his mind - or perhaps he'd accidentally sat on a piece of equipment. Either way he pushed the woman off of him, muttering apologies that he didn't really mean as he pulled on his pants, redid the buttons, and slipped on his shoes (over the years he'd become just as quick at putting his clothes on as he was taking them off). Dan felt ill, tightening his tie and rushing back to the courtroom hoping no one would know what had just transpired. He prayed to God that Petunia would say nothing of it.

Lunch over (more limp sandwiches) and session underway Dan used mostly instinct to get him to the end, unaware that he'd gone through several cases without saying anything lude or obnoxious. Good Lord, what was happening to him? " _If you don't you might regret it"_ Oh… right. Dan waited for Harry's obligatory goodbye, glared at Mac because the other man's obvious mirth at his expense was not appreciated, and watched Christine's head of blonde walk off whereas he normally would have watched somewhere further south. In the end there was only Hatti Digger, her pale hands working a scrunchy around her thick hair and getting hopelessly tangled. He watched her, a few quiet curses passing her lips before she gave up and left her concerns for when she arrived home. Dan's mouth went inexplicably dry. He wanted to keep watching her, to see Hatti Digger when she thought no one was there.

Suddenly aware of his presence she looked up at him, a crease forming between her eyebrows. For a moment he feared for his life, the way one hand clenched into a fist at her side, but then again, knowing Hatti she would have found the idea "most unsavory in a public setting" or however the heck she normally talked. Dan, bolstering his courage, walked over to her with briefcase in hand. He smiled jauntily, innocently, and otherwise obliviously to her clear disgust. It didn't do much to calm her.

"Hi," Dan waved his free hand. Hatti hummed, "Hello Mr. Fielding." She looked over her right shoulder at the doorway. If he wanted to win her over he needed to strike before made to leave! "I uh… I wanted to apologize for my behaviour two days ago," he scratched the bridge of his nose with one finger, "I was a complete-" he stopped, waiting for her to fill in the blank as most everyone else did. Much to his surprise Hatti said nothing, and he let the silence stand. Dan had never been one to insult himself, he couldn't pretend that he didn't mean it.  
"Apology accepted," Hatti nodded. The ADA hesitated, confusion bubbling up, "What?" he asked stupidly. Hatti offered a fake smile, "I forgive you, is that a difficult concept to understand?" she raised an eyebrow at him. Unsure if she was being cruel on purpose or not Dan let it slide, "No...well, yes. But thank you," he cleared his throat awkwardly, turning his gaze to the floor. It really was a very nice floor…

There was silence, uncomfortable. Dan more often than not, hated silence. Back in Louisiana there had always been the squeal of the pigs, the call of his parents, the ever present hum of cicadas, and the shouts from the guys at school that he'd used to follow around like a puppy, desperate for attention (that is until he found Chip). Silence meant he was left to his thoughts, and his thoughts weren't very nice to anyone else much less himself. Sucking in a calming breath and hoping that his distress didn't show on his face, Dan addressed Hatti Digger, "So I was wondering-"  
"I wait three months before starting a physical relationship because I want it to mean something. I want to be in love first," Hatti supplied, tugging at her sleeve, a nervous habit he hadn't noticed before. The ADA blinked, "Ah… I see. Actually that- that wasn't what I was going to ask. Though that's good information. Thank you."  
Hatti looked mildly surprised, "Then… what was it you want to know?" her blue irises searched his. Ah, eye contact, he hated that too.

"I was wondering how you felt about Christmas… and Thanksgiving, and all the Holidays really. Do you celebrate that sort of thing?"

Again she looked surprised, not that he could blame her it was an odd question. Hatti took his words in and looked thoughtfully at the dingy far wall. A few seconds leaning towards a minute that felt like _hours_ later she turned her gaze back to him, "My family never paid much attention to the Holidays. At Christmas we had a tree and presents but no ceremony... and now that I've moved out I spend them alone.," she said it all softly but to the point, much as she had about her art obsession. Dan's heart felt squeezed, "So what you're saying is that you'd _like_ to spend the Holidays with someone but there's no one?"

Hatti shrugged, "I suppose that is my point, yes." she looked almost sad, but that would be too much emotion for one day so it dropped. It was in that moment, or that answer, that Dan knew what he wanted to do. Silently he leaned forward, bending down just enough to be level with the Bailiff. Hatti didn't pull away, but looked tense and bewildered. "Hatti, I would very much like to take you out again on a proper date and make you my girlfriend. That is, if you'll still have me. I promise I'll follow both rules to the letter," Dan hummed, the scent of green apples overtaking his senses. Normally the offer wouldn't need to be spoken, becoming a couple would just...happen, but he thought with Hatti Digger he needed a little more ceremony.

Hatti ran a hand across her ponytail, eyebrows drawing together. Dan felt more than a little bit stupid standing so close to her while she had this internal battle, but thought it would probably be worse if he moved. All he really hoped was that no one else would walk in and see the display. Finally the Bailiff seemed to have come to a conclusion and she nodded once, a sharp movement followed by her thrusting her face towards his. Dan's mouth met Hatti's and he allowed himself to melt into the kiss. Unlike with Katherine Hopkins he let it be soft and simple, his right hand getting lost in her hair and the other finding purchase on her hip. Hatti gripped the loose fabric of his jacket, bunching it up in her fists as if to keep him level with her. The Bailiff let out a soft, satisfied moan before pulling back and full on grinning which was a sight to see. Dan straightened his posture and returned the gesture, "You're quite good at that."  
"Why thank you," she replied smoothly, letting her hands fall to the short jury box barrier, "And you aren't as terrible as I thought you would be."

Dan's mouth dropped open in mock indignation, "Oho, you dare insult the great Dan Fielding? You haven't seen anything yet!" He crossed his arms in front of his chest, looking and feeling smug. Hatti rolled her eyes, "We'll see." With that she started to walk off at a slow pace, adding a little sway to her hips that couldn't possibly be accidental. She halted her progress and turned to look over her shoulder at the the ADA, "Oh, and I feel I should mention- if it is any consolation to our relationship going forwards: The last boyfriend I dated for longer than three months broke up with me because I was too... _much,_ for him," Her face went a blotchy red with undisguised sheepishness that was undermined by the following saucy wink, and then she continued to the door.

Dan waited until she was out of sight to do another happy dance.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading! :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5- A Wager**

He was flirting with her.

Dan sat on the complete opposite of the table from Hatti Digger, plastic spoon in one hand. Hatti leaned forward slightly, incredulous eyebrow raised at the antics of her new boyfriend. The spoon dipped into the cup of chocolate pudding he had cradled in his left hand, then he lifted it for the second time to his lips, running his long tongue across the edges whilst keeping his chocolate gaze fixed on her. With a near silent huff of amusement Hatti sliced a piece of cold chocolate cream pie off the small paper plate in front of her, and slowly brought it to her lips. She ignored the buzz of life surrounding them, though she was sure the two of them made quite a sight, both eating their dessert as seductively as they possibly could. Hatti wasn't sure exactly why it was happening (she sure as heck knew it wasn't going to lead to anything), but she wasn't about to stop… not when she was _winning_ at least.

Licking a splotch of whipped cream off of her fingers caused Dan to lean back, his chin tilted upwards and his arms spread wide as though her were preparing to fly. He still held the spoon, between two long fingers, the pudding cup discarded on the tabletop, " _Take me_ ," he exhaled, appearing as submissive as possible. Hatti shook her head, hunching her shoulders in a prolonged shrug, "No thank you." was her simple, amused, reply. He looked at her and laughed.

"What were you guys doing?"

Hatti looked from Dan to Christine Sullivan, the perfect features of her face formed a mixture of confusion and mirth. Hatti hoped her expression didn't show her embarrassment. Had anyone else actually been watching the display? "Just… eating. I wouldn't expect you to understand," Dan said before Hatti could come up with anything good to say. Christine didn't look like she believed him, and also slightly affronted by the hidden implication in his words, but allowed it to drop, "Fine," she rolled her eyes, "Oh yeah, Dan, did you get a chance to look over the Oscarson case?" she enquired, sitting between them. Hatti couldn't help but be mildly annoyed by the intrusion, though she knew part of it was born of the pettiest of jealousies. Those of which she despised. Hatti liked how she herself looked, she liked her hair and her curves and her clear skin in equal measure. But Christine Sullivan had everything, beautiful blonde hair that didn't frizz on rainy days and a tall, curvaceous figure that Hatti had only found on models in magazines she'd seen in the stores but never bought. If she were to have one other complaint about the woman it was her endless cheeriness, something she preferred in moderation.|  
Biting the inside of her cheek to silently reprimand herself, Hatti listened to the two talk. "Yeah," Dan hummed, scraping the inside of the tiny plastic cup to retrieve the very last morsels of pudding inside, "What're you thinking?"  
"Is Oscarson the large man with the tattoos?" Hatti asked, abruptly aware that she had interrupted before Miss Sullivan could reply to Dan. She hated doing things like that, but couldn't find it in her to apologize without drawing more attention to the slipup. The ADA nodded, "He makes Bull look like a tiny bald-headed _mouse_." He involuntarily shuddered. "Yeah well, at the rate things are going he'll be in here until tomorrow," Christine let her chin rest on her hand, looking thoughtful. Hatti could imagine the defence strategies running through the woman's head, something that might actually work for a man that had taken out someone's car with a parking meter he'd _pulled from the ground_. "All the better," Dan spat, furiously stirring air with his spoon, "A guy like that needs time to learn that violence isn't the only answer," he put on a high pitched, lisping voice.

Harry Stone approached the table interrupting the conversation, his tie patterned with "Vase of Flowers" by Jan Davidsz de Heem*. Hatti doubted he knew that, not many people did, and she was certain the tie maker did little research beyond "Oh, pretty flowers". Hatti had always found that picture to be among the few flower related paintings she actually loved (that alongside those of Van Gogh of course!)

"Session's going to start soon folks, better get to your stations," he grinned in that cheesy way of his. Harry had an infectious smile, allowing the corners of Hatti's mouth to upturn ever-so-slightly. She stood up, collecting the small paper plate that had once housed her pie and setting off towards the nearest trash bin. Dan stood up as well, a swift movement that displayed the length of his legs as he jumped to follow her.  
"Hey Hatti, do you mind if I move our date from ten to eleven? Seems I'm going to be working later than I thought," he bent towards her when Hatti stopped at the garbage can. "But we had a date," she protested, pushing fists against her hips and putting on a look of anger she didn't feel. Dan entreatingly took one of her hands away from her side and kissed it her knuckles, "Please forgive me my love," he purred, wiping accidental saliva away with his other hand, "I know not what I do."  
Hatti couldn't help but snort, "Oh I think you do," she pulled her hand away, "Alright, I will allow you to postpone our rendezvous if I must. I suppose I have some work I should catch up on. Something to do with standing around and guiding criminals back and forth," she twirled a golden curl around her finger.

Dan didn't hesitate to meet her mouth with his.

* * *

Christine watched the couple, unable to hear what they were saying but getting the general gist. They were joking back and forth with each other and she knew for a fact that they had been making goo-goo eyes at each other when she'd arrived! When the two kissed she restrained a visible "Aw". It was an odd feeling to have, especially when one half of that couple was Dan Fielding, the man who on several occasions had complimented far too many parts of her anatomy to be proper. Still, she liked Hatti and she thought she might be a good influence on the morally grey attorney. Roz's arrival out of the corner of her eye caught Christine's attention and she called to her, waving a hand. The Bailiff approached the table, "Something you want Christine?" she asked. Used to Roz's brusque behaviour she pointed to Dan and Hatti, Dan's hands getting lost in the poof of hair his girlfriend possessed. Roz's expression was unreadable as she looked at the two. Christine attempted to help her, "Aren't they a cute couple?" she crossed her arms over the lowest point of her ribcage. "Oh yes... adorable," she said sarcastically. Harry reminded both of them of his presence with a comment of his own, "I think they make a good team. They haven't been together long enough for me to judge… Get it?" he elbowed Roz who gave him a warning look. He retreated before limbs could be lost, "D'you know I think she's going to last. At least until they...y'know" Harry added thoughtfully.

"Who didn't do who?"

Both Mac and Bull. The whole gang appeared to have gathered as though they sensed gossip and were drawn to it like a magnet. Christine would later deny the way she leaned towards Harry, "They haven't done that yet?" she nearly yelped. That was odd. She turned to where the couple were standing, only to find them gone. In all likeliness they were waiting for them in the courtroom, confused as to where everyone went.  
Harry looked nervous, "I dunno if I should tell you anything." Mac tugged at his tie, "Tell us what sir?" he grinned, his voice taking up the quality it often did when he wanted to get something out of his boss. Harry looked around briefly then leaned in towards the middle of the ragtag group. He whispered, "Dan told me that Hatti wouldn't go out with him unless he agreed not to have sex with her for three months," he then stood to his full height, looking slightly proud to be the bearer of such "scandal".

"What? No way!" Mac looked agog.  
"Oh yes way."  
"Nu-uh!"  
"You'd better believe it!"

The delivery between both Mac and Harry was so smooth one would have thought they'd rehearsed it ahead of time. "Good for her," Christine interjected before more disbelief could be shared, "It's about time someone put Dan in his place."  
Bull shifted rocked to the side as he shuffled his feet, "Gee, he must really like her," there was a sharp edge to that sentence that went unnoticed by everyone except Christine. She knew he'd had a bit of a crush on her since day one, though the two had made it into a friendship instead. "I still don't believe it. Are we talking about the same Dan who couldn't last two weeks for a sperm test?"  
Harry shrugged, "Maybe he's finally grown up and become a mature responsible adult," he suggested. Silence. "No way!" Mac spluttered, "I bet you he wouldn't last more than a week," he crossed his arms over his chest, a challenge in his eyes, a similar smile twitching beneath his mustache. "Oh come on Mac, I think Dan could last longer than that!"  
"How long sir?"  
Christine could see where this was going and she didn't much care for it. That wouldn't prevent her from putting her own money in on the secret pool if she were to be asked. "Oh I'd say… a month!" The Judge declared. Mac hummed, "Care to...place a bet on that sir?" he made the international sign for money with his fingers. Harry took the bait, "You're on!"

Two more bets were taken, one from Christine (Two months, giving him the benefit of the doubt) and Bull (That following Thursday- no- the whole three months!-no wait, definitely Thursday- could they come back to him?) until all eyes fell on Roz who had remained completely silent through the whole conversation. "What about you Roz, care to make a friendly wager?" Harry offered, rushing fingers through his short blondish brown hair. Roz didn't respond for a while, then in a voice devoid of emotion she said, "I don't care to make bets on other people's love lives." with that she walked away, hands folded in front of her.

Christine felt the familiar tug of guilt, the feeling that came whenever she insulted Harry for just being a man or accidentally laughed at one of Dan's jokes at someone else's expense. The "pot" thus far only came to about ten dollars, but the principle behind Roz's sudden departure still stung. Mac waved her off, though she could tell he was feeling about the same. _Come on this is Dan Fielding, it's not like it's someone who would care!_ Her mind was quick to remind her.

Maybe not, but if Hatti Digger found out…

* * *

Under Dan's instructions Hatti drove to his apartment (from what she understood, though he did not tell her, was that his car was on the fritz), dressed in a plain blue dress that left everything to the imagination and of course she had traded her work shoes for those of a fancier grade (though similarly lacking in heel). She stepped out of her car, adjusting her skirt when an autumnal wind blue beneath it, goose bumps stood out on her pale legs. Hatti had always liked the cold, though the wind ruining her attempt at fully detangled hair was a pain. It was a decent neighborhood, she thought as she approached Dan's apartment building. His place must have cost a pretty penny.  
Through the door, following her memory, she entered the elevator. She took a deep relaxing (more than a little tired) breath as the floating feeling consumed her. It stopped with a ding and she exited the enclosed space until she came to the appropriate door.

With a strong hand Hatti knocked thrice on the painted wood, just below the metal numbers and letter painted the common golden color. She fluffed her hair once, not that it needed any help in that regard. The door opened revealing Dan bedecked in the same suit she had seen him in half an hour ago, though he'd apparently changed his tie from a deep blue to a similarly deep purple instead. "Good evening My Dear," he greeted in a syrupy voice, stepping away from the door to allow her entrance. Hatti didn't hesitate to do just that, her gaze sweeping over the unfamiliar room. It was a large space, she thought, with blue walls and off-white carpeting. He had a tall wooden coat rack next to the door, his long overcoat and scarf hanging off of it. Sitting back near the windows on Hatti's immediate left was a sofa, on the wall with the entrance door sat a fireplace with a handsome painting print hung over it. On the farthest wall were two white doors, one in all likeliness leading to his bedroom and the other… kitchen? Bathroom? "Welcome to my humble abode," Dan purred, clearly pleased to find her entranced by his place of residence.

Hatti stepped further into the room, passing a chest of sorts where a selection of alcoholic drinks (those not to her taste) atop it, as well as an ashtray with the old disgustingly scented remains of past cigarettes sat. Hatti had always hated cigarettes, and those weak enough to smoke them. Her father used to smoke a pipe, the smell lingering in his study and giving Hatti terrible headaches that lingered until the semi-fresh air of outside was allowed to enter her lungs. Dan swept towards the left of the two doors and was soon out of sight, only to return not long after with a box of chocolates. "For you," he said, holding the object out with a flourish. Unlike the flowers, Hatti was more than happy to accept this gift. "Thank you," she said, "I wasn't expecting... " she stopped herself. Dan was giving her a look that said _So?_ Hatti smiled, fingering the red ribbon surrounding the box, "Thank you," she repeated for good measure.

Dan looked quite pleased with himself (which was nothing new) as he straightened his tie with lithe fingers, "So, shall we?" he gestured to the door. Hatti nodded, tucking the box underneath her upper arm, one hand flying up to make sure all the buttons of her thick woolen coat remained in the appropriate state for going out. She had just started to walk back the way she came when she was stopped by Dan. "Ah, actually, I should probably make a quick trip to the bathroom first. Mind waiting for me?" he jabbed a thumb towards one of the doors that evidently did not lead to the kitchen. Hatti blinked, "I am perfectly alright with waiting," she replied. Dan nodded once then took up a near jog towards the door, "Go ahead and make yourself comfortable," he waved a hand at the couch before he went officially out of sight.

Hatti let out a soft sigh, cautiously strolling about the room. She eyed the print in its frame, sat on the sofa, then eventually sought out something more interesting. It wasn't as though Dan had been taking that long in the bathroom, it was merely a bout of rabid curiosity that overtook the woman. If anyone were to ask her she would put it down to the long hours at work: standing, that had put her in such a mood.. Or, perhaps a product of excitement caused by a first date with her now official boyfriend. Either way, Hatti approached Dan's bedroom, the door left open a crack from his excursion to get the chocolates. Quietly as possible she pushed through, thankful it didn't creak as she did so. The sight that met her was… unexpected. A large bed with a thick blanket and about six pillows, a short trampoline leaned against the wall, a side table, the front drawer of said side table sitting open. Hatti, feeling more than a little bit like a jerk, walked towards the drawer. She set the chocolates onto the bed, tucking her hands instead into the pockets of her coat. Hm, Jumper cables? _Why on earth…!?_ She was about to turn around when she caught sight of a picture frame, half hidden by a cloth beneath the cables. Hatti looked briefly over her shoulder before brushing aside the cloth just enough to get a better idea of what the faded old picture was.

Two people, a man and a woman somewhere in their later forties and wearing clothes that looked as though they'd been hand mended many times, stood on either side and slightly behind a teenager nearing adulthood. It wasn't hard to figure out who this teenager was. He was overly tall and gawky, with big brown puppy dog eyes and a forced smile. He wore a cheap suit that was a little too wide around the middle for his lean frame, and a water stained tie. The older couple each had one hand on his shoulders, beaming with what could only be absolute pride. Hatti bit her lip, trying hard to avoid getting lipstick on her teeth as she did so, turning away from the drawer. The guilt gnawed hard at her stomach. What was she doing? This was hardly appropriate behavior, she mentally chided herself, what would her father say?! With that thought she started back towards the living room only to find something else entirely. Left of her exit stood two tall sliding closet doors, likely hiding more things she shouldn't find without permission. What caught her attention though was not those doors, but what sat on a small round, wooden table.

* * *

Dan finished in the bathroom, having both used the toilet and dabbed on a little more cologne for the occasion, only to find that his date had left! His lips parted in confusion, ready to call for Hatti. Instead he found the door to his bedroom far more open than when he'd left it. _No!_ He strode quickly to his room, rushing through the door to find Hatti immediately next to him. He cringed at the sight. Hatti was leaning forwards, peering into a clear glass tank with a curious look on her face. Inside that tank...was a turtle.  
Dan swallowed, a blush crawling across his face. He felt like an idiot. What kind of grown man kept a turtle as a pet? Hatti stood straight, and looked at him with a level of warmth he hadn't been expecting. He wished she would stop that. "I didn't realize you had a pet," she said, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. Dan nodded mutely, unsure of what to say. "What is its moniker?" That was one thing he liked about her, Hatti delighted in the unnecessary words that made most people look pretentious. She came by it honestly too, she didn't do it to appear smarter or show that she came from "good breeding".  
"Ah," Dan scratched the back of his head, again feeling like a fool, "It's... Arnold." It had been a lonely Christmas when he'd bought that turtle.  
Dan was fully prepared for Hatti to snort or roll her eyes as she did at most of his over the top life, instead she leaned back towards the tank and asked in a delicate voice:

"How can you tell if it is a male?"

The inner nerd inside Dan came screaming to the forefront of his mind and he eagerly approached her, still blushing but feeling much more at ease with the situation. "Here I'll show you," he pulled open the top and set it aside. One sleeve rolled up Dan's hand descended into the glass tank. Hatti watched as his fingers danced around the turtle, finally taking hold of either side of its shell. The creature looked surprisingly calm as it began flying up and out of its home. Dan held Arnold up for her to see, "This is a Box Turtle so it's actually easier to find the difference between male and female. The male's shell is usually flatter and less domed than the female, and their eyes are more often than not sort of an orange-y color." With gentle grip he flipped the unsuspecting creature onto his back, it snapped at one of Dan's fingers as he ran a pale finger across the creature's plated stomach and ended up pointing to a spot about halfway into the turtle's tail, "And this is the Cloaca, in females it's usually closer to the body and the males is further along the tail. It's how the turtle relieves itself _and_ gets lucky," he quirked an eyebrow, chuckling lightly at his own (sort of a) joke. Hatti tutted, though her gaze remained fixed upon the creature. "Would you like to hold him? He'll probably try to bite you but it doesn't hurt much," he hastened to assure her. Hatti looked hesitant to touch the creature and its shell covered in a few places by a greenish slime.  
Slowly two pale hands extended towards his and Dan eased Arnold into them. He watched as she balanced the squirming reptile, trying not to be either bitten or attacked by his long toenails. "Hold both sides of his shell," The Attorney instructed, Hatti adjusted accordingly. Hatti turned towards the tank, perhaps to ensure that, should the creature slip from her grasp, it would not fall to its death. Dan stepped closer to her, looking over her shoulder at his pet. Most of the time he had the creature and its heat lamp hidden in the closet (the empty closet rather than the one that housed his many, many suits, devoid of obvious burnables beyond the walls and doors) because he knew most women would not accept having the creature in the same room while they had sex. Most would have laughed at him, or looked at him funny. Hatti didn't, which intrigued him. In all fairness she wasn't like those other women, she was more modest, her morals appeared (on the surface) to be airtight, and she enjoyed things like Van Gogh and carrying a gun around at work. Still…

Dan became suddenly aware of the proximity between the two of them. She was just the right height for his chin to rest on the top of her head, his arms would wrap around her middle just beneath her breasts. The heavy outerwear she wore hid the soft, rounded lines of her milky white shoulders. Dan inhaled slightly, she'd worn perfume, a heavenly flowery scent that had been put on lightly so that it didn't overwhelm his senses much less her own. Dan felt a curl tickle his chin as he seemed to be leaning closer and closer to her without his mind's permission. Heat consumed him. He recognized the feeling of lust well enough to know that what he was doing was _very wrong_. With a shaky exhale Dan retreated, nearly tripping over his own feet. He could not, or at least, _would not_ betray Hatti Digger's trust to feed his base urges! Hatti, noticing his quick escape, hastened to set Arnold back into his tank. "Dan?" she asked, brow furrowed. The ADA coughed into his closed fist, "We should uh- we should wash our hands and go," he chose to ignore the squeaky quality his voice had decided to take up. Hatti blinked, but acquiesced with a single bob of her head. Dan allowed her to walk ahead of him, taking a moment to gather his frayed thoughts.

 _Think cold!_

* * *

 **I don't know if you noticed but… this took forever. I apologize. It took me some twelve false starts before inspiration FINALLY took off! *sheesh* Not even sure I like it very much.**

 ***I know little to nothing about "Jan Davidsz de Heem", I merely looked up "Famous flower paintings" and that was one of the choices. I would recommend, however, that you look at it because it is quite lovely.**

 **Two more things:  
1- I refuse to believe that Dan doesn't own a turtle. I know it's not realistic but… C'mon it's adorable XD  
2- I changed the design of Dan's bedroom from the descriptions they sort of gave in "Rabid". I didn't think it was quite the look I was going for. (Descriptions of Dan's apartment are from my hazy memory as well, sorry about inaccuracies)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6- Chokehold**

The room was stagnating in uncomfortable silence, the type of silence that reached into your mind and brought forth all the memories you had been trying to avoid. Hatti leaned back in her chair, a collection of Go Fish cards in her hands that she'd organised by type and from smallest to largest number. Across the table was Bull who puzzled over his own cards, eyes narrowed and eyebrows lowered. He bit his bottom lip, appearing by all means to be someone in the throes of a serious mental problem. "Got any two's?"  
Hatti snapped to attention, "Go Fish," she said. The fact that he didn't say "do you have any" rather than "got" rankled her a bit, but she knew correcting him would put a damper on the game. The silence broken by their voices, several pairs of disinterested eyes all belonging to fellow Bailiff's flew to the two. Bull plucked a card from the deck, "Aha!" he declared, grabbing three more from his other hand and plopping all four two's onto the table. Hatti sighed, "You are too good at this… Bull," she fought to say the name, earning a pleased grin from her friend for making the effort. It shouldn't have been an effort, she reminded herself, but it was what it was. Bull tilted his head, "Aw," he voiced, "I used to play this game all the time with my family, that and chutes and ladders."  
"Do you have any Kings?" The shorter Bailiff asked. Bull passed over a card.

"Do you have siblings?" Hatti inquired politely, keeping the conversation moving as any good person would. Bull nodded, "Three. Two sisters and a brother," he shifted in the small metal chair the lounge had provided, "Alice, Rosetta, and Ahab." He gave a thoughtful look to Hatti's right shoulder, suggesting he was thinking about his family. She wondered what they did and the relationship between them. But more importantly… "Ahab?"  
Bull shrugged as though resigned to the oddities of his parents' naming choices, "Got any Aces?"  
"Go fish," Hatti replied, though her attention had shifted far away from the game at hand. "Do you have any brothers or sisters Hatti?" Bull's cheerful voice seemed to fill the whole room and once again they brought a myriad of listless gazes to their table. Hatti shook her head, "I am an only child," she elaborated uselessly, "My parents weren't entirely interested in children."  
Bull looked confused, "But… they had you," he said, lowering his voice slightly. Hatti sighed again, a soft, listless sound even to her own ears. "Yes," was all she said in return, then, "Do you have any sevens?"

* * *

Bull watched Hatti the rest of the day, during session and otherwise. She didn't seem terribly sad over their conversation earlier in the Bailiff's lounge, but if he were to be honest, it was kind of hard to tell with her. Hatti stood and did her job without saying a word, her gaze trailing mostly after her _boyfriend_ Dan. Ugh. Bull had been present for three weeks of open affection between the two, and to be honest he was getting a little sick of it. Not that he disliked how "smiley" Hatti had become, which wasn't very but it was certainly more than before. He liked seeing her happy, her blue eyes positively sparkled when she was happy. _She's too good for you_ , he reminded himself with more than a little self recrimination in mind. Hatti was smart and kind and accepting, she let him go on at the Museum (which reminded him, they had another museum outing planned) only adding something when she thought he was finished. He sighed wistfully.

Bull watched as a mustacheod Bailiff (Johnson?) brought in the next case. Bull immediately recognized the man, a seven foot brute by the name of James Oscarson. He'd been brought in several weeks ago for trashing another man's car. Bull stiffened his broad shoulders in preparation for a fight, the few things he remembered about the man weren't very good. Roz hummed from beside him, making no comment otherwise. She too looked ready for an attack of some sort, though she somehow managed to pass it off in a casual stance. Hatti approached and stood beside Roz, her blonde hair tied back in a ponytail. Bull couldn't help but stare briefly at her long neck.

"Final case your honor. Oscarson: assault."

Harry looked at the tall man with raised eyebrows, earning him a glower in return. Oscarson was wearing a red and white striped shirt that reminded Bull of "Where's Waldo", (the chuckle that escaped him earned him several bewildered looks) besides that he had dark brown hair and thick eyebrows, thin lips that pressed together and a square jawline that pulsated with unresolved tension. "Let's see what the damage is shall we. Fielding?" Harry waved the other man on with his left hand. Dan looked at his paper, "Well sir, it seems Oscarson The Grouch here was standing in long line for the movies-"  
"They were re-showing ET, you think I'm going to pass that up?!" the taller man explained irately, crossing meaty arms over each other. Dan scoffed, "Seems you know a thing or two about freaks of nature," he huffed beneath his breath, though it was most assured that everyone in the room had heard, "Anyway, reports from several witnesses state that a man named Bell stepped into the front of the line and this _walking ad for steroids_ over here decided to enact his own justice," he turned a contemptuous look at the giant. Oscarson's upper lip curled, "Why don't you just shut it beanpole," he snapped. "Mr. Oscarson, we already have a load of evidence against you, let's not add to the list," Harry pushed in. Bull looked between all four of them, the way Harry's hand twitched above his gavel and the pained crease between Christine's eyebrows. They wanted things to end quickly he supposed.

"Your Honor, the defendant merely went up there to talk to Mr. Bell, but the man proved to be… difficult, so my client attempted to bring him to the back of the line," her voice weakened the further she went. The Judge sniffed, "Where exactly is Mr. Bell right now?"  
Christine cleared her throat, "The hospital, it seems there were a few broken bones involved and-" Suddenly Dan's voice erupted from him, filled with derision and hate, "Broken? Try shattered! Your honor this man is a menace to society, I say we lock him up and throw away the key before he does any more damage!" he flopped his file down onto the bench. "Hey, I told you to shut it!" "Oh yeah, what are you going to do, take me down like you did Bell? I guess that's all meatheads like you are good for," he tilted his chin upwards in an attempt to look down his nose at the other man. Bull was unaccustomed to Dan fighting back against anyone, much less a seven foot weight lifter type like Oscarson. Still, though a worried knot formed between the shorter man's brow he stood his ground. That still didn't mean things were going to end well. Oscarson unexpectedly lunged for Dan like a wild animal, one giant arm wrapping around the ADA's neck and tightening around it. All of the Bailiff's reacted quickly, Bull moving to grab the taller man's shoulders whilst Roz took out her gun and made her way to the front of the aggressor so that he knew he wouldn't be getting away. The problem, was that Dan was in the way, his face rapidly turning purple as he pathetically attempted to pry the stronger man off of him.

"Let him go Oscarson!" Harry demanded, on his feet and looking angry, hiding how frightened he probably was. "Not until he passes out," laughed the terrible man who no longer resembled Where's Waldo in the least little bit. Roz hissed, "I can't get a clean shot." Bull tried harder to get the man off of his friend, prying at the man's arms. Dan let out a strangled, "Halp!", several other Bailiff's ushered in and pointed their guns.

And then, everything seemed to stop.

Hatti Digger stood behind Oscarson, landing a sharp kick to the back of one knee which caused him to lower himself to her level against his will (unfortunately dragging Dan with him), then with more speed than Bull thought possible for the short, somewhat chubby, woman, she pressed a gun to the back of the man's head. "Let. Him. Go." she said, emotionless. For a moment Bull thought it wouldn't work, Oscarson's expression not changing from the look of utter hostility... Then arms snapped apart like opened handcuffs. Dan stumbled then collapsed, coughing and gasping for breath. Christine knelt beside him, unsure of what to do so she gently rubbed one of his shoulders. "Take him," Hatti said, jaw clenched. Roz did the honor, grabbing the man by the collar of his shirt so that he had to stand hunched to her level, "You're coming with me," she said dangerously. It was no use for him to struggle against the woman and likewise there was no doubt in anyone's mind that they would never see Oscarson again. Bull smirked, then followed the ever growing group of people surrounding Dan.

"Dan, are you alright? Should I call a doctor?" Harry asked gently. The ADA shook his head, croaking out a "No". Thankfully the original color had begun to return to his face. Bull knew a thing or two about neck injuries and strangulation (on roughly eighty-seven species) and didn't think avoiding a Doctor was the best option. Harry rushed back up to his bench and slammed the gavel on it, "Recess! Take a break for… well, until we get things sorted out!" he called. A few people still lingered, some of them looking mildly concerned while others appeared more excited than anything. Mac crouched down in front of Dan, "Harry, how about you go get him some water?" he asked, the use of his real name not escaping Bull's attention. He found it odd that he hadn't been the one to fetch it, except maybe the Clerk thought he would mess it up? Bull humphed to himself silently. "Sure thing Mac," The Judge nodded and rushed off to find a cup. A movement out of the corner of his eye had Bull turning to find Hatti standing away from the crowd, her expression oddly blank in the face of her boyfriend coughing up his lungs. Her blonde hair and dark clothes made her stand starkly against the dull grey surroundings, like a little light shining in the dark (hm… he would have to write a poem about that.) The tall Bailiff tilted his head a little and approached her, trying to appear gentle in front of her. "You ok?" he asked in a voice he usually reserved for children. Hatti nodded, not speaking until Dan had been brought to his feet,"Yes, thank you Bull."

He was surprised to find no hesitation when she spoke his first name.

* * *

Dan had been put in Harry's office to rest a bit on his couch. When Hatti entered he was supine atop the green cushions, long legs curled up so that his feet didn't hang off the end. One hand cradled his neck, idly rubbing at pale skin that had begun to bruise slightly. It was lucky Oscarson hadn't used his hands she thought bitterly. "Dan?" she spoke softly, hoping not to startle him. His eyes opened, "Sup?" he choked out with a dry cough, moving into a sitting position with a wince. "Are you alright?" Hatti inquired, approaching him as though he were something that might explode. Dan looked up at her, "No," he spat, "I was just strangled by an ogre!"  
Hatti's amusement at Dan's name for that wretched man fought with the sympathy inside of her. "I imagine that ogre will be spending an extensive time in jail for doing so, that is not to mention his assault of Mr. Bell," she fought the urge to reach out and touch him, maybe stroke his cheek or run fingers through his dark hair. She had never been comfortable touching anyone, unless it was for a handshake or (on the other end of the spectrum) a moment of intense passion. It always felt awkward and false.

Dan looked at the wall with a faraway gaze. Hatti wished she knew what he was thinking, how he felt. Was he shaken? Scared? Angry? Shellshocked? She bit the inside of her cheek, recalling her own past encounters with violent people and eventually settled and sitting next to him. She let his arm press gently against hers and few seconds later his foot bumped gently against her own. Hatti raised an eyebrow, "What are you doing?"  
Dan shrugged which rumpled the shoulder of Hatti's uniform, "I'm being playful," he explained with a lopsided smirk, a hand still present on his neck. How odd, Hatti considered as she managed to toe the side of his polished shoe, that he had somehow come out of being strangled with as much enthusiasm as he'd had that morning. How on earth did he _manage it_? Without warning Dan let his head drop onto Hatti's shoulder, startling her and actually causing her to emit a small yelp of surprise. She immediately countered it with an awkward clearing of her throat that _definitely_ didn't make things worse. Dan didn't seem to care though, and merely sighed contentedly through his nose mingled with a pleasured rumble that sounded like he was getting ready to fall asleep. Hatti uncomfortably let her cheek rest against the top of his head. His hair smelled kind of nice, she thought in some vain attempt to force herself to be happy with the situation. A hand extended and landed on her knee, "Thanks for saving my life," Dan murmured in a voice so quiet it took her a good amount of time to work out what it was he'd just said.

"You are very welcome Mr Fielding."

Dan felt solid beside her, a heavy weight on her. It struck her just how big he was, not in the sense that he was fat (the idea was laughable), rather the general size of him. His hands consumed her, he stood a good foot taller than her, and it fascinated her every time they kissed the size of his head in comparison to her own. If she were to voice that thought, she knew she would be looked at like a crazy person of course. The short Bailiff had just begun to relax when the door suddenly flung open and a man she didn't recognize shuffled into the room. Her first impression of him was as follows: Homeless. His face was dirty and covered in stubble, his eyes though filled with concern also held a level of sleeplessness that came with taking up refuge on the street. He had dark hair that had receded, and wore clothes that had holes and dirt seared into the fabric. "Dan, oh Dan!" he cried desperately, then he caught sight of the two together and gaped, "Ah,I'm sorry. I'll leave you two alone!" He turned to leave.  
Hatti immediately took it upon herself to stand, brushing creases out of her skirt with an air of dignity she didn't feel. "Phil come back here," Dan snapped, looking more than a little put out that his pillow had left.

The bum looked back around the door, "I heard what happened," he explained, "Are you alright Boss?" the way he said "boss" was interesting, like "bow-oss", Hatti had to take a moment to let the word sink in. "Where the hell were you anyway?" the ADA huffed angrily, "I had errands I wanted you to do."  
"Sorry Boss," Phil the homeless man whimpered like a puppy that had been kicked, "I heard that they hadn't cleaned the garbage cans last night, I was feeling a little bit peckish," he smiled sheepishly. "Ugh, spare me the details. Just, go get me a cup of water or… something," he waved the other man off, "Uh, on the other hand, go tell someone else to get me a cup of water, I wouldn't want to drink out of anything you've touched," he quirked his mouth into an unpleasant smirk.

Phil departed as quickly as he'd arrived, with a nod and a "You got it Boss!" that was far too perky. Hatti looked back down at Dan who stretched out his legs like a cat, "Care to join me again My Dear?" he purred (again, like a member of the feline family). Hatti hesitated to answer him, confused over everything else. She bit the inside of her cheek, "I… should return to the Bailiff's lounge and retrieve something," she lied, "Please excuse me." She didn't wait for him to answer before she left the room and started aimlessly down the halls.

* * *

 **Boom! I got a chapter done on a Saturday! Suck it self-doubt!  
I noticed in quite a few fanfics about Night Court, a lack of Phil. If you're going to write about Dan, you have to put Phil in there somewhere! I definitely want to write a Phil POV at some point, hmmm...**

 **Reviews are my favorite, but if you are only reading I shall not hold a grudge. X)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7- The best laid plans are the ones never made!**

Two things Dan realized after being slapped across the face:

1- His neck still kind of hurt

2- A lot of women didn't like being turned down almost as much as they didn't like being hit on in the first place.

As he watched the irate woman flounce off with an air of superiority, Dan rubbed at his stinging cheek. On several occasions he would have taken a slap as a challenge, not now though. How odd it was to be knocked around for being a decent guy! With a disdainful sniff (directed at the world rather than one party), the daily newspaper tucked beneath his arm, Dan started towards the Cafeteria. He came in nearest the wall covered in windows and stopped. Carelessly Dan scanned the room in search of a good place to sit. On the longest, and usually the most occupied of tables, he saw Harry conversing with the group. The Judge ran a coin between each finger, making it dance as he talked. Christine looked amused, her chin cradled in one hand whilst the other used a fork to poke at her salad. Mac leaned back in his chair with hands behind his head as he offered his own thoughts on "the matter" whatever it may be, with Bull and Roz mostly listening (the latter likely to add something sarcastic when her time came). Something about that scene nagged at him, like weights attaching themselves to his arms, trying to bring him down. With a quiet acknowledgment of his own need to be alone (though not really, so surrounded was he) the Attorney took a hasty turn towards one of the smaller, empty tables near the window. Dan sat. He leaned away from the table with his back near the wall to cross his legs because it was too short, then with a casual flick of his wrist the newspaper in his hands flew open. He had just gotten through the headline when he noticed, or rather, some _one_ standing next to him.

"May I sit with you?"

Dan blinked at Hatti Digger, then with a welcoming smile took it upon himself to tut like a cheerful grandmother and continue in a voice very much the same, "You just sit down right now child, ol' Dan's gonna take care of you now," if he could have reached he would have patted the chair across from him. Hatti sniffed, setting down her tray first (a grey, greasy burger and a collection of fries that were a little _too_ golden) moving to sit across from him. She adjusted her skirt so that it properly covered her thighs then plucked at a fry listlessly. Dan tilted his head, "Just so you know, you don't ever have to ask me."

"Pardon?" she looked confused then immediately after she corrected herself, "Oh, yes... thank you," the corners of her tastefully colored lips upturned, it pushed out her round cheeks. She really did have a sweet smile, even if in the long run it landed her with irreversible laugh lines. Dan waved a dismissive hand, the newspaper forgotten for the moment. Ever since their little sit down on the couch (and after his near strangulation, thank you very much), he'd become more and more... _interested_ in her. It was quite bothersome, then, that she'd retreated like a frightened deer. He tapped his fingernails twice on the table before casually plucking a fry from Hatti's plate, biting half of it as he mulled over the problem that continued to dog him. How was he going to make three months... turn into _tomorrow?_

Hatti, who had started eating her burger, showed no sign of acknowledgment that he'd stolen from her, she merely freed up one hand and pushed her tray his direction. _Huh, doesn't mind sharing her food._ He cataloged it above "likes turtles" in his mind and moved on.

Something racious happened at the Judge's table and Dan poked his tongue against the inside of one cheek, turning a glare on them for no reason he was willing analyze. Maybe it was jealousy? They were having fun without him! Or irritation that they couldn't keep it down while others were trying to eat? Of course, if he were to be sitting with them his presence would have clearly shifted the mood, they probably _wouldn't_ have been laughing. He bopped his foot up and down, ignoring Hatti until she suddenly took it upon herself to steal the newspaper out of his hand. Dan's eyebrows rose and he stared at her stupidly. She shrugged, shoving her plate completely to his side as though it were a form of payment. The Attorney fought for something funny or intelligent to say that would break the silence and finally settled on, "What, no pickle?" which in hindsight, sounded better in his head. Nonetheless Hatti snorted with amusement, "I ate it already, my apologies," she let her head drop a little as though deeply embarrassed until a few seconds later she brought her gaze back up to meet his, "Or, is that a euphemism I never knew about?" Her boyfriend uncrossed his legs so that he could properly lean over the table (nearly sticking his tie in ketchup), "Only if you want it to be." Flirtation rolled easily off his tongue, it was like breathing to him. What was odd was how it seemed to be nearly as natural to Hatti as well. The short Bailiff set down the newspaper and scoffed, offering nothing else. Dan breathed out slowly through his nose, contemplating the woman before him as she seemed to focus more on the table than anything.  
What Hatti Digger needed, was a way to properly come out of her shell. What Hatti Digger needed was an opening...

And what Dan needed, was a plan!

* * *

Mac Robinson was an overtaxed, enduring sort of a man. He went in to work, he did his job, he listened, he joked, he laughed, he went home and prepared to tolerate it all again. He recalled once, taking a bullet to his calf. Luckily, it hadn't hit anything important (more of a graze really) and had healed within as short a time as possible. That didn't mean, however, that it hadn't hurt. Mac's whole leg had throbbed for ages, switching between burning and the awful sensation of restless, twitching, muscles. He would've given anything to never go through that again! And yet… as Harry pulled a coin from behind his ear for the fiftieth time that week, he considered returning to Vietnam to find the guy that shot him to ask for a moment's reprieve! The Judge's reuse of the same trick (that alongside juggling, card tricks, and the old whoopie cushion gag) was brought out of boredom mostly, the cases were light, dull, and droned on for longer than they should have . The Clerk managed a tight, cheesy smile and forced out a chuckle as well as a kind, "Good one sir". Harry still smiled at him crookedly and with understanding beyond him, leaning back in his chair. His thin body swam in his black Judge's robe, making him look bigger than he actually was. Less fragile.

Mac plucked a file from the bench and tucked it between his upper arm, "Looks like we're all done here sir," he said. Harry sighed long windedly, "Gee Mac," he huffed, rubbing at one eye with the quarter still tucked between his fingers, "I guess we could send everyone home early." A few members of the staff perked up at the prospect. "Your choice sir," Mac hummed. He'd learned it best to let the other man come to his own conclusions with the help of minor suggestions. It was how he got little Renee to take baths after all, even though she didn't _quite_ speak the language yet.

"Well folks," The Judge addressed the crowd, all half asleep, "It seems we're done for the night! Go home to your loved ones... or your not so loved ones, whatever the case may be," he banged his gavel. The first to spring up was Dan Fielding (of course) who grinned almost evilly, eyes squinted and directed at Hatti Digger who appeared unimpressed. She tugged at the bottom of her uniform, squaring her shoulders as the ADA approached. He then leaned down and met her mouth in a prolonged kiss. "Would you look at that," commented Harry who had removed his robe and come up beside his friend. Mac nodded, crossing his arms, "Kind of makes you want to upchuck, don't it sir," he smirked. Harry punched his shoulder the shoulder, "I'll be in my office for a bit," he said, then walked off at a steady, upbeat, pace.

Dan parted with Hatti (to breathe most likely), then he looked down at her adoringly. Mac had to admit the other man had been… slightly less obnoxious the past few weeks. He hadn't come clammering into the courtroom declaring loudly that he'd snagged a date with anyone at the very least. It seemed Mac's decision to go with "One week" for the bet hadn't been a smart one.  
Hatti said something to Dan softly, then departed alongside Bull. Probably off to get something from from the Bailiff's Lounge. Mac turned his attention to his own work, sitting in his chair to properly shutdown the computer.

A loud clap startled Mac away from the screen and towards Fielding whose hands rubbed together and whose mouth formed a dastardly grin. He chuckled to himself, approaching the Clerk. Ah yes, this was the man Mac knew, a man with a _scheme_. "Do you want something Dan?" he asked, feigning disinterest. The ADA pushed fingers through his hair, "Nah," he used the same hand to wave away the other man's inquiry. "You look quite pleased with yourself, anything I should know?" Mac pushed, threading his fingers together atop the desk just before the keyboard. Across the room Christine had collected her things in her briefcase and walked out, leaving the two basically alone. "Oh, nothing. I just have an evening of wining and dining planned for the delicate and lovely Hatti Digger," Dan lifted his leg so that he sat on the edge of Mac's desk, one foot still firmly on the floor. Mac wasn't sure delicate was quite the correct word to use regarding Miss Digger, but let it slide. The Court Clerk tilted his head, "And?"  
" _And!_ " with one hand the ADA reached into the inside of his suit jacket, removing from it a flat velvet box. Mac raised both eyebrows in surprise when Dan opened it before him, revealing a silver necklace. Three deep blue opals (real or fake he wasn't sure) hung at even intervals across it, strung together by thin, shining silver threads. Mac's eyes nearly bugged out of his head, "Wow," he said in a whisper. "I hope that's her reaction, this sucker cost me a pretty penny I can tell you. But, if everything goes to plan it'll all be worth it tonight," Dan snapped the box shut.  
"And what exactly do you mean by that?" Mac stood up, buttoning his sweater without looking. Indecision crossed the ADA's face just for a moment, but the need to brag seemed to overtake him and he leaned in conspiratorially.

The air seemed to still as Dan excitedly chattered, "I have this problem with Hatti, she doesn't want sex for three months," he crossed his arms, rumpling his suit and tie, "I got the idea though that if I can't make a move on _her_ , maybe she could make a move on _me_!" he moved back an inch, smiling like an overjoyed toddler that had just been given candy to top it all off, " _So_ , I'm going to give her this necklace, treat her to an expensive dinner, then take her back to my place for coffee and Beethoven… Maybe Chopin, I haven't decided. Ha ha! She'll be putty in my hands, or vice versa," he grinned full on. Mac allowed himself to smile at the other man, unsure of how to feel. On the one hand, he expected no less from Fielding, and on several occasions had derived amusement out of the Prosecuting Attorney's wild tales. On the other, manipulating Hatti Digger's feelings was low and petty even for him! It all came down to Hatti Digger though, didn't it? So there really wasn't a problem. The shorter man clapped his coworker on the shoulder, "Well, uh, good luck with that Dan," he managed awkwardly, clapping him on the shoulder and nearly sending the taller man off his perch and onto the floor. Dan scoffed, standing, "As if I need it," he then, with more energy than should be in anyone over thirty, twisted around and walked to his table.

Mac looked disparagingly at Fielding's back and sighed, a low bone weary sound that came from having to deal with difficult people all day, even if they were his closest friends (yes, even Fielding). All well, he huffed, turning to leave the other man to his own devices. If there was one thing Mac was sure of it was this: When it came to Dan Fielding, once a creep _always_ a creep.

* * *

Dan thought of himself as a highly desirable man. The past ten or so years had done little to dissuade that thought. That didn't mean, however, that the women he dated didn't need a little reminder of said desirability. Hatti, for instance, seemed to be one of those people.  
Of course he didn't want to force himself on her, which was why he decided nudging her in the right direction was the better option. Dan cautiously traced a hand over the hidden velvet box hugged close to his chest. He felt a sudden tug inside of him, uncomfortable and surprisingly emotional as soon as Hatti reentered the room. She'd changed into her civvies, this time a forest green sweater and jeans. He wasn't accustomed to seeing her wearing pants, the way it accentuated the curve of her hips all the way to her knees. Her hair had been pulled back into a ponytail again, showing off how long her neck was. It made her look kind of awkward, he thought, being a short person that was more neck than legs. Still he smiled with genuine fondness, his body reacting before his mind did to bring him to her. He met her lips with his, paying no mind to the ache in his back when he bent down to kiss her. She pressed the palm of her hand against his cheek, cold but soft.

Hatti was the first to remove herself from their embrace, one hand rising to tuck an ever unruly curl behind her ear. "I have serious plans for us tonight," Dan explained, brushing fingers over his tie. Hatti opened her mouth to reply, only to be interrupted.

"Alright Hatti I'm ready to go!"

Dan looked incredulously at the galumphing oaf that entered from just to the right of the Judge's stand. Hatti cleared her throat and he snapped his attention back down to her, "I promised Mr. Shannon that I would go to the Natural History Museum with him. Perhaps tomorrow?"

Dan's mouth fell open, "You've got to be kidding me!" he yelped indignantly, "C'mon, it took me almost an hour to get those reservations! Now you want to dump me for Hong Kong Junior over here?" he waved a hand at an affronted Bull. The tall Bailiff stepped forward only to be stopped by Hatti's hand on his chest, a warning look in her eyes for both men. "Bull asked me first," she replied coolly, not appearing in the slightest swayed. Dan spluttered, "But-"  
"Would you like to come with us?" Hatti cut him off, taking one of his hands in her own. Her fingers were cold, impersonal to him in that moment. He felt...betrayed almost, unsure. "No," he scoffed, his selfish desire to have her to himself overtaking any promise of spending time with her, "There is no way I'm hanging out in a dusty old Museum with you and- and-" he hesitated to give Bull another rude name- he had enough sense of self preservation to avoid going any farther. Instead he uttered a pained, "Tonight was supposed to be special!" and almost immediately realized his mistake.

Hatti's brow furrowed, "Special _how_?" she asked, letting his hand drop and putting space between them. He could almost pretend that the hopefulness in her gaze wouldn't go away if he told her the truth. That she would smile brightly at him and tell him what a good idea it was! "Uh," Dan laughed awkwardly, "Well, you see," he scratched the side of his nose with one finger. Why was coming up with a lie so hard all of a sudden?!

Hatti turned around to face Bull, "Wait for me near the elevator, please?" she asked gently, "I won't be long." Bull spared one last glare to Dan who smiled cheekily in return (because he could) before he marched off.

The shortest of the Bailiff's turned back to Dan with reproach in her gaze this time, the silence surrounding them making it all the more piercing and uncomfortable. Dan shuffled his feet a little bit, waiting for her to speak. When she didn't for some time he clenched his jaw, "What?" he snapped, more aggressively than he really felt. Hatti shook her head, "I do not believe you. Tonight was supposed to be _special_? Am I meant to believe that was an innocent suggestion?"  
"Well you might have if I had said anything beyond that," he returned with a shrug, another uneasy chuckle. He didn't really have a defence for this one, "Look, I just wanted to… you know."  
"Oh yes, I know," Hatti practically snarled, "How dare you treat me like a child, guiding me along by the hand as if I don't know my own mind!" She stormed over to the bench and then swiftly spun to face him again, her ponytail sticking itself on her shoulder so that it brushed against her right cheek when she looked straight on. Dan planted his fingertips atop his briefcase, "I was not treating you like a child, I wanted to- you see- but it doesn't matter now does it?" he attempted to force all of his emotions down like a bug beneath one's thumb. He could hardly handle confrontation, especially over a half-baked three-day-to-create plan! Hatti's oceanic eyes inexplicably softened, turning from a full blaze to the flicker of a candle flame. She looked down at the floor, it's surface scuffed by all manner of different shoes.

"I could have shot you, you know."

Dan immediately flashed back to several near death situations. Being chased with an axe by a "scorned" lover especially came to mind… "Oh yeah?" he forced a smile, "When?"  
Hatti quirked her mouth into a half smile as she sensed his thoughts, "When I held the gun to Oscarson's head. If I had shot him there was a chance I- I might of shot you. I care about you-"  
"And that's why you didn't shoot me? I'm flattered," Dan shot back sarcastically with a nod of his head. He was glad her anger had dissipated so quickly, but found no solace in the seriousness of the conversation. What had been a romantic plan had turned into a far worse reality. Hatti let out a sharp puff of air through her nose, crossing her arms so that she looked to be hugging herself. She seemed surprisingly vulnerable, which only made things worse. "No," Hatti said, "I put the gut to his head because I care about you. I wanted to do anything to make him stop, because I care about you." Her face turned a delicate red. Dan stepped towards her, "And I care about you, which is why I want this to happen," he explained. He wondered if this was a whole truth, if he really wanted to have Hatti Digger because he cared about her or if it was only… the way he was. Hatti let her hands drop to her sides, "I care about you Dan… but I don't _love_ you. I explained this to you already, didn't I?" Dan sighed, an almost wistful sound to his own ears. "Yeah," he replied, "Yeah you did. Look, I don't want to ruin this..." He could quite bring himself to apologize.

Hatti approached him, then much to his surprise, wrapped her arms around his middle. Her head rested on his chest, right next to the necklace. Dan let his hands rest on her lower back, his chin falling to the top of her head just like he'd imagined it. _Oh_ but this did feel nice! "Three months." she muttered, one side of her mouth partially smushed against his chest. Dan raised a hand to stroke the back of her head, letting a loose lock of golden hair tangle between his fingers. "You bet...Three months."

* * *

 **This chapter took me way longer than I thought it would, and to be honest I kind of hate it (maybe because I spent so much time working on it that I got sick of it?). I don't know if it's rushed or if I feel like I forced everything or what! Just that I don't like it. BUT, don't let my own feelings on this chapter influence your own, let me know what** _ **you**_ **feel! And, if you have any suggestions to improve this I would be glad to listen ;)**

 **Thank you to Guest and** **anneviktor** **r for their reviews (they're a good kick in the pants I need sometimes to keep writing Lol)!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8- Razzle Dazzle and Mel Torm** **é**

Hatti Digger curled up on the couch with a bowl of macaroni cradled in both hands. She drew her knees to her chest, using one to make up for the absence of her right hand which took up the fork. She'd made it out of the box, not having the energy to bother with "real cheese" or the like. Instead she allowed the powdered kind to gum up her throat with every swallow, washed down with a glass of water sitting on the side table. Across from her the TV showed some old black and white movie that Hatti had no interest in watching, but did nothing to change the channel. It was on mute anyways, she disliked the intrusion of sound when she was home alone. A noodle between her teeth, the young Baillif let out a soft sigh through the nose. She couldn't quite identify the feeling that had overtaken her. Boredom, or some strain of loneliness? Hatti imagined that even on their days off, Christine and Harry might be out to a Musical or something equally ridiculous. Roz would be out at a club, if not at home sharpening and cleaning all her weapons. Mac would be with his family, his wife and small daughter (neither of whom Hatti'd had the pleasure to meet), and Bull would be doing something erm, quirky, but didn't that describe all of them and everything they did? Yes, Bull would be at home practicing the accordion or writing a long poem about his "deep" inner feelings.

Hatti smoothed out a wrinkled in her jeans with her palm, suddenly feeling a headache coming on. All of them, from Harry to Bull had something at least semi-worthwhile with which to spend their time. What did Hatti do? She sat on a couch and ate bad macaroni feeling sorry for herself.

The sound of the phone ringing nearly sent Hatti out of her skin! Heart beating like a bongo drum, she set aside her dinner and rushed to the kitchen where her phone hung on the wall, waiting for her to pay it some attention. She took it, shifting her hair so that it could reach her ear. Hatti could hardly contain the faint hope that it was one of her parents remembering to acknowledge her existence, but the probability was small and thus she spoke: "Hello, you have reached Hatti Digger's residence." She placed her free hand on her chest so that her fingertips touched her collarbone. The sound that met her was nothing but heavy breathing, a sickly sound that seemed to steal the air out of her own lungs. Face reddening with anger and disgust Hatti thrust the phone back to the receiver only to hesitate nearly nearly a centimeter away from hanging up. Slowly she brought the phone back to her ear, "Dan?" The idea was ludicrous but still she asked.  
"...How'd you know?" came the pouty reply. Hatti sighed again, quieter, and this time with relief. At least she was being harassed by someone she cared about.  
"What on earth were you doing?" she demanded, her voice light with humor. "Wait, you have to let me finish!" protested her boyfriend, Hatti raised an eyebrow but allowed him to continue. Dan cleared his throat then spoke in a low, seductive rumble, "Hey Baby, I'm just sitting here, naked and alone,here in my apartment thinking of you...interested?"  
Hatti laughed then, it burst out of her like water through a broken dam. Feeling both utterly confused and equally amused, Hatti pinched the bridge of her nose. "Who wouldn't be?" she muttered sarcastically.

There was a momentary pause where neither knew what to say. Hatti listened to his breathing instead, faint as it was over the phone. "So… how are you?" Dan asked awkwardly, clearing his throat in a single cough directed away from the receiver. Hatti plucked at a loose thread at the edge of her jeans, "I'm fine. And you?"  
"Good," Dan replied, "Besides, you know, incredibly _bored."  
_ "Ah I see," Hatti rolled her eyes, "You want me to entertain you," the toe of her shoe pushed against the slim foot of her stool. "Well, yeah. Why do you think I'm dating you?" he laughed, it sounded sort of giggly. Dan always seemed to be the one to laugh at his own jokes. "Well alright," she conceded with a bob of her head that he, of course, could not see, "Perhaps we should send our conversation in a more entertaining direction?"

Dan didn't say anything for a good amount of time. Hatti didn't have the heart to interrupt, for fear he was thinking of something, something important or silly- whatever tickled his fancy. "So," he started eventually, "You never did tell me why you became a Bailiff."

Hatti suddenly felt very tired. She cast her gaze to the living room across the way, her macaroni nearly cold and her water slowly going stale. "I wanted to, is that hard to believe?" she asked. A snort. "No… well, yes actually. I mean, I get that you're brave and have a strong sense of justice and all that _stuff_ , but, why not a police officer?" the genuine curiosity in his voice threw Hatti a bit. She fought for a good answer, one that would make sense for both of them to understand. "Because I couldn't imagine myself being anything else." The fact that Dan had said that on their first date was clearly not lost on him, he hummed with displeasure. "Fine. Well do you at least have any plans to move up in this career of yours?"

Hatti shrugged, then remembered that she had to say something too, "I am not particularly interested at the moment." The thought hadn't even occurred to her. Was there more she could do with this job? She supposed there was always Head Bailiff, not that it looked like the cushiest job.

"But you must have some form of ambition!" Dan prodded determinedly, his voice lowering a fraction as it turned more serious. Hatti ran a hand across her scalp, drawing in a slow breath. "I started this job less than a month ago," she argued. The man on the other end tsked, "Oh puh-lease. You have to put yourself out there... like me."  
Hatti let the phone cord drop from her finger, "Example please," a smirk tugged at her lips. Dan didn't hesitate to answer her, "Well, _for example_ , I once ran for City Council!"

A memory long forgotten struck Hatti and her eyes widened, "I remember that."  
"Actually maybe it's better you _not_ -" Dan stumbled. Hatti continued regardless, "I do believe I voted for you."

The man on the other end made a strange noise that sounded like the excited squawk of a bird, "You did?!" Hatti tilted her head, the question making little sense to her, "Yes. Wasn't the other man... dead?"

" _Exactly!"_

The subject went on for some time, Dan chattering about the advantages of being alive. Hatti merely listened, unable to disagree but too confused to get as worked up as he was. Eventually she managed to send it a different direction, allowing her boyfriend another stab at a conversation topic- perhaps one less interrogative.

"So, how'd your little date with Bull go?"

Hatti blinked, not expecting that question. The fact that the "date" as he called it had been about two days ago _probably_ had something to do with it. "It went well. If you had come along you might have known that," she challenged him. The following scoff was so mockingly derisive Hatti nearly hung up on him. "I don't get how you could be around Bull rather than me. He has the mental capability of a turnip!"

"Dan-"

"Did you know, that when you described him as "assiduous" at his job he thought you'd called him a type of tree?"

"Daniel!"

He stopped, probably pouting. Dan had the ability to look completely innocent when he pouted, hiding the fact that he was indeed a _grown man_ getting ready to throw a temper tantrum. Hatti fought back the growing anger at him, repeating in her head that he was trying to be a good, steady boyfriend and thus she should be able to tolerate the swing of his moods. "Are you jealous Mr. Fielding?"  
"No," he mumbled (still pouting), again she allowed herself to envision his movement. Stretching out his neck, tracing the lines of his neck down to his clavicle with thumb and forefinger, "Never."

"Good," Hatti let her shoulders slump a little, "Then perhaps we could let this go? Mr. Shannon is my friend and nothing else." it felt good to say it out loud, some assurance that she was not romantically interested in Bull Shannon. Though he was a tall man, with a strong jaw and an appreciation for art.  
"Listen to you, _Mr. Fielding, Mr. Shannon_. You're so uptight."  
Hatti fought down the sudden overwhelming urge to call out "Am not!" and instead switched ears with the phone, "I hardly think that's appropriate-"  
"There see, who talks like that?" Dan laughed. It surprised her to hear no actual taunt in his words or his laughter, unlike the way he insulted everyone else. It felt as though he were merely stating fact and he accepted it. She wasn't sure how to feel about that.  
Hatti could just imagine his smug little smirk, eyes crinkling at the corners. She understood what he meant, that didn't mean that it bothered her any less. Hatti had never been comfortable with people in a way most others were. With Bull she feared upsetting him in some way if she made a joke she might with Dan, she didn't like Christine enough to really try, and she certainly couldn't talk openly with the Judge! Hatti suddenly remembered a moment from her childhood, at school watching other children all huddle into their groups. She'd picked one at random and, with a book about making friends (a gift from her mother) tucked under her arm, had told a knock-knock-joke. They'd played along long enough to get to the punch line, then fell into stony, unimpressed silence. Hatti'd merely smiled, trying to appear amicable at all costs. While that particular friend group hadn't been mean, they had started another conversation as though she'd never been there at all. Was Dan right? Was she really so out of place?

It was only a moment later that Hatti realized she'd been silent for far too long. Allowing her memories to fall back into the pit from whence they'd come, she tutted at her boyfriend. "I have manners, there is a difference."  
"Oh come on," came his disbelieving reply, "I bet you haven't done a single improper thing in your life." Hatti narrowed her eyes, not sure if that was true or not. The first (and last) one night stand she'd gone through had been rather improper- but she could hardly bring that up! As it turned out, she didn't need to when Dan's voice cut through her thoughts, challenge in his tone.

"Oh yeah? Prove it."

* * *

Harry Stone let his chin fall onto his arms, crossed atop the bench. His gaze trailed over the small crowd, a few recognizable faces in the audience. Phil was there, looking as though someone had given him the important job of sitting there and _By God_ he was going to do it! Lips sticking out a little, Harry turned to Christine who tapped her fingers impatiently on her table. Mac approached with a file, looking towards where the Assistant District Attorney should have been but clearly wasn't. "Dan not here yet?" he asked, clearly a question he already knew the answer to. Harry nodded, wrinkling the sleeves of his robe. "I notice Miss Digger isn't here either," Mac continued regardless of his friend's silence, "I wonder why?"  
The Judge grunted as he thrust his head back, leaning against his chair this time, "I really don't want to know," he said, managing a smile at the sight of Mac's cheesy grin. He knew the Clerk was trying to alleviate both the boredom and the frustration at being made to wait. Session was supposed to have started ten minutes ago! "Oh me neither sir," Mac nodded.  
"You don't suppose they've been in some kind of accident do you?" Harry's brow furrowed as he imagined a number of terrible circumstances that could have befallen the two. The Clerk standing before him rolled his eyes, "Both of them? In separate cars?"

Bull's approach did not go unnoticed, "Maybe they crashed into each other, leaving a mangle of burning flesh and warped metal?" he offered helpfully. Harry groaned, pinching the bridge of his upright nose, "I'd appreciate it if you kept your ideas to yourself next time Big Guy." Bull merely shrugged.

The double doors across the way opened, and a body slid past them gingerly. Hatti Digger shuffled her feet, standing mere inches from the entrance, looking nervous. Harry was about to say something to her, ask her why she was late maybe, when she opened her mouth and did something surprising.

"Give 'em the old razzle dazzle... razzle dazzle 'em*"

Hatti's voice was quiet and out of tune, though perhaps with some training she might turn out to be a decent singer. Harry watched, dumbstruck, as she continued. "Give 'em an act with- with lots of flash in it, a-and the reaction will be passionate," her face reddened and she looked at the floor, her voice wavering. Harry had never heard her stumble over her words, it was oddly pleasant to see her being human The door behind her opened to reveal Dan Fielding's head, he muttered something that seemed to bolster Hatti's courage a little bit. What in the Hell was going on? Hatti started to sing louder, "Give 'em the old hocus pocus, bead and feather 'em. How can they see with sequins in their eyes?" she stretched out the final word, her foot tapping out of synch with her song and in a stilted motion. Dan fully entered the courtroom, putting himself next to his girlfriend. In a voice clear as day Hatti sang, "What if your hinges all are rusting?" to which Dan replied in one of his slimier voices, oozing with greasy charm: "What if, in fact, you're just- _disgusting_?"

Then the two joined together for the big finale, "Razzle dazzle 'em - and they'll never catch wise!" Dan struck a pose, Hatti hugged herself.

Well, there was only one thing Harry could do in such a situation… he stood up and started clapping!

Hatti's face schooled into something more blank, though he could tell by the rosy color of her round cheeks she was less than pleased. Dan bumped against her arm with his, "Nice job. Here kid you earned it," the ADA reached into one of the pockets of his suit and removed a crisp dollar bill. Hatti snatched it from his grip, then raised it up again, "I do believe the deal was ten dollars Mr. Fielding," she said in a terse voice, though nothing about her body language suggested her to be actually angry. Harry watched as Dan reluctantly removed another bill from his pocket and slapped it into Hatti's hand, muttering something rather naughty. Hatti nodded her head once, graciously, walking towards the jury box to take up her place next to Roz. Harry sat down again, grinning from ear to ear. "That was great!" he declared, slapping a hand on the bench's smooth surface. Hatti wrinkled her nose. "Do you take requests?" the Judge asked. If he were closer to her, he would have elbowed her in the side playfully. Hatti pursed her lips, not saying anything. The joke had run its course, time to get to work.

Harry broke session for lunch with a heavy bang of his gavel, sending a raised eyebrow at the defendant as he was led away, he'd been charged with indecent exposure after sunbathing in the park in only his shorts. The weird thing, was that he had a bra shaped tan line but no such garment had been found around him! Shaking his head as though he were trying to dislodge water from his ears, Harry attempted to forget the mental image. With a rush he rose to his feet, rocking from one to the other before he took up a trot towards Hatti who stood in the space between the jury box and Dan's table. "Hey Miss Digger," he greeted. "Judge Stone," she said plainly. Harry was sad to find her quiet demeanor returned, and decided that would never do! "Stop me if you've heard this one. What do you get when you cross a giraffe with a german shepherd?" he leaned towards her expectantly. The look Hatti gave him was unreadable, "I don't know sir," she replied good naturedly. "A watchdog for the eighteenth floor!**" Harry gave his signature wide eyed, wide mouthed expression as he waited for the laughter. Hatti shook her head, "That… that was terrible."  
The Judge was about to reply when he was rudely interrupted by of Dan Fielding.

"You ready to go my lovely?'

His tall form cut between the Judge and the Bailiff, pulling her into his arms only to end up with an elbow in his stomach that made him yelp. "Hey," he huffed unhappily, though he allowed Hatti her space. Harry raised an eyebrow at the two of them, crossing his arms over his chest. "So Dan, dare I ask why you two came in late today...singing?" He wasn't upset of course. Harry enjoyed anything that could lighten the mood in what was sometimes a dismal evening. There was poverty and cruelty and all manner of things that choked the life out of a person unless they either 1: grew to not care- or 2: learned to add a little sunshine to the darkness. Harry thought he himself offered plenty of sunshine for everyone, but that didn't mean he didn't appreciate a little help every once in awhile. Dan looked thoughtful for a moment, "Well, first I offered her ten dollars and then… no wait, that's it." He tapped his chin with his pointer finger. Harry rolled his eyes, "Well, if you ever decide to do that again might I suggest a little," eyebrow waggle, "Mel Tormé?"

"Who-"

A sudden yell on Dan's part interrupted Hatti's sentence before she could get to the second word. The sharp, slightly alarming shout startled both Harry and Hatti who turned to look at him as though he were insane. It took a moment for Harry to grasp what the Bailiff had been about to say (likely the reason for Dan's sudden cry) and his mouth dropped open, "Oh come on, don't tell me you've never heard of Mel Tormé!" _The horror!_ Dan put his forehead in his hands, groaning. Hatti blinked, "I imagine he or she is a singer?"

"HE is the world's greatest singer. The Velvet Fog. Seriously what is it with kids today, do they live under rocks?" he threw his hands up irritatedly, slapping them back down on his thighs. Hatti's brow knit together, "I'm thirty eight***. I also don't listen to music unless I have to."  
Dan laughed lightly, incredulously, "What?" his eyes narrowed slightly. Hatti shrugged her shoulders, ruffling her hair, "I prefer things to be quiet. Does that bother you?" the honesty in her question allowed Dan to answer in a less than sarcastic manner, a slight pout formed out of his thin lips. "I don't know," he hummed, "You at least have a favorite style of music though, _right_?"

Hatti shook her head.

An uneasiness fell over the group. Harry cleared his throat, summoning their attention once again. "Well uh, we best get off to the Cafeteria. I hear there's tacos!" he backed away from the two, ushering them forward with a hand. He was happy to find the two following him immediately. Just before the double doors though. Harry heard their footsteps stop. After a moment a gentle "What was that for?" from the Attorney suggested either a hug or a kiss. Hatti's voice could barely be heard, but Harry still managed to make out the soft words whispered to her boyfriend.

" _For singing with me."_

* * *

 **Again I apologize for the wait- and also the spacing, my word program doesn't transfer perfectly with this site.  
**

 ***That song gets stuck in my head way too often!  
**The watchdog for the eighteenth floor joke I heard on Mork and Mindy. XD  
** *****So I imagine that this is set somewhere around the middle of the series (definitely after Dan's Operation), so that makes him around forty two or forty three? I wanted Hatti to be at least sort of close to his age so I settled for thirty eight. ;)**

 **-Thanks for reading!**


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